Have you ever felt like you are living in some sort of “Groundhog Day” world, where things keep repeating over and over again? I have begun to feel like I’m just doing the same shit day in and day out. It’s as if I’m just running in a giant hamster wheel. I need to change something. I’m not sure what yet, but I’m sure I’ll yell something like “Gadzooks” or “Eureka” once I’ve figured it out.
I spent most of yesterday recovering from the side effects of Novocain. I hate that shit. It makes me so woozy. (The upside is, the root canal is finally finished. They filled the tooth…) the last time I had Novocain; I fell down a flight of stairs afterwards. (I think the worst part is seeing the ground rush up to meet you in slow motion…) Happily I didn’t feel it, at least until later, and then for my troubles, I received quite the bruise.
My jaw still hurts. I swear I’ve hurt less after a fistfight than after a trip to the dentist. I’m starting to think that in the event of my most likely “untimely” demise, perhaps professionals in the dental industry should be questioned first.
I tend to think of dentists as being supremely confident people. You’d have to be. Given that your job is to inflict pain on everyone who walks through the door, and still manage to carry on with pleasant small talk. I’m not sure I’d be able to do that. Mind you, I guess that would depend on if I liked the person or not…
But I digress…
I had what you might call a happy accident yesterday. I ran into Freddy and Rob Hawkes. I wound up having lunch with them. It was a nice surprise. I got to hear about their adventures at the Montreal Festival. Rob met one of my comedic hero’s, Eddie Izzard. I have to admit, I was more than a little jealous when I heard that. I can’t wait till I go to the festival. I’m really hoping that I can get it sorted for the near (ish) future. (It’s a fair amount of work to get there, so keep your fingers crossed, and I’ll get stabbing away at it.)
I think we may have decided to start writing together. That has all the hallmarks of being a really good thing. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a good writing group. It’s amazing how much more quickly you can bring things to the stage when you have some people you can bounce stuff off of. It becomes a little easier to refine jokes and separate the gold from the cannon fodder. I’ve tried writing with some of the newer guys, but they still have their comedy water wings on, and I find it less productive. (Although this just may be a perception issue on my part.)
I guess once you’ve found a groove, it’s hard to get comfortable elsewhere. Brett, Pete, Shane and myself all started at roughly the same time. We had each other, and despite our occasional bickering, we got funny together. It was always easy to write with those guys. We understood each other, and knew the mechanics of everyone’s act. Since we’ve all been scattered to the winds, it’s been hard to strike up a new group.
I think that Freddy and Rob will be a good fit. We have been around each other for years, and I know I’m comfortable enough to work with them. More importantly I like them as people, and that always helps.
Perhaps it boils down to this. I feel like the “middle child” in the comedy scene. This may partially be accounted for by the absence of my immediate peer group. Additionally, The guys who came before me, while still good friends, have their own things going on, and the guys who came after me are still at a level where self-indulgence is the principal writing motivation.
I feel like there’s an avalanche about to happen. I have scores of new ideas that I’ve been farting around with. It will be nice to iron them out, and retire some older material. This business should be about the constant evolution of material, (which is not often the case… And I’m as guilty as the next comic…)
Anyway, enough for now…
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
07/26/05 Ketchup Sammichs
I had this very funny dream last night. President Bush was sitting in the oval office, wearing a black leather jacket, and pretending to be the “Fonz.” (I have thought for some time that he kind of looks like a Fonzie… A Fonzie in serious need of a good poop, but a Fonzie nonetheless…) Then he got messed up on meth amphetamines and started calling Condi Rice his favourite “Negro.” Condi got all flushed, they started making out, and then it got more graphic from there. Laura Bush came in dressed in a “Springer & Hannity in 08” t-shirt. She was holding a big plate of home made cookies. She wasn’t shocked by her husband’s behaviour. In fact she just started to laugh and then said “Oh George…”
Now… I have strange dreams all the time. Usually though, I’m on safari, or scoring the winning overtime goal for the Flames, or doing something incredible. Never do I dream about this kind of psychobabble nonsense. I must have eaten something odd last night. I wish I were kidding around about this dream. It actually bothered me. (Mind you, I suspect that any dream where President Bush is a principle character would be bothersome to most.)
I have been trying to ignore American politics in this for the past little while. (With the exception of the last post… But Rove just pissed me off.) Lately I seem to be drawn to it again. I guess I’m just bored and the magnetic pull of that circus of chaos is too much for me to resist. In my mind I compare it to the magnetic pull of Woolco. (In a time before Wal-Mart sullied the Canadian landscape.)
To explain, when I was a teenager, and started hanging out at the mall, (The Avalon Mall in St. John’s) one of the anchor stores was Woolco. It didn’t seem to matter where you started in the mall, sooner or later you’d inexplicably wind up in the centre of Woolco, usually with a confused look on your face. The only thought being “How the fuck did I get here…” Then you’d go the “Red Grill” for a plate of fries and gravy. There would be a few other people that got caught in the whirling retailer vortex, scratching their heads and trying to enjoy some sort of greasy treat.
That must be it. American politics is like a greasy treat. It’s fast, easily accessible, and really, really bad for you. It makes perfect sense. To take it one step further, it is just as unsatisfying in the long run.
I visited Micah Wright’s website yesterday. For those of you who don’t know who he is, Micah is an artist, and has been running the “Propaganda Remix Project.” He takes Second World War and Cold War posters, and puts a new spin on them for the time that we live in. He has a good sense of humour and has used his conscience to make a statement. Anyway, he posts the hate mail that he gets, and some of it is really awful.
You’ll really be floored by the level of ignorance that these people spew. He regularly gets called things like a communist, a traitor, a faggot, and the list goes on and on. The usual “Archie Bunker” slobs bark at him with barbs like “Love it or leave it…” etc. It’s sad that they don’t realize it takes more conviction to stand up and question things than it does to piss on someone.
It’s sad that people can’t get past their own prejudices. We all have them, and I am no exception. For instance, I would be inclined to call the people that emailed Micah “hillbillies”, still others would get the label “dullards and rednecks”, then there are a few that could be stacked into the “Ketchup sammich eating trailer park trash” pile. But then again, I have no problem with the double standard, and I have no problem stooping to their level. I’m willing to fight fire with fire. I’m more than willing to get my hands dirty. Someone has to.
Liberals (and don’t get confused with a “party” here…) have been demonized and for some reason fail to strike back. Some might use the “Why stoop to that level?” argument. I think that’s bullshit. When you’re running for your life, seldom should you stop and be polite, or take the high road. There is absolutely no time for it.
It appears I’m off on a rant again…
Check out Micah's website...
www.micahwright.com
Perhaps leave him a nice message.
Now… I have strange dreams all the time. Usually though, I’m on safari, or scoring the winning overtime goal for the Flames, or doing something incredible. Never do I dream about this kind of psychobabble nonsense. I must have eaten something odd last night. I wish I were kidding around about this dream. It actually bothered me. (Mind you, I suspect that any dream where President Bush is a principle character would be bothersome to most.)
I have been trying to ignore American politics in this for the past little while. (With the exception of the last post… But Rove just pissed me off.) Lately I seem to be drawn to it again. I guess I’m just bored and the magnetic pull of that circus of chaos is too much for me to resist. In my mind I compare it to the magnetic pull of Woolco. (In a time before Wal-Mart sullied the Canadian landscape.)
To explain, when I was a teenager, and started hanging out at the mall, (The Avalon Mall in St. John’s) one of the anchor stores was Woolco. It didn’t seem to matter where you started in the mall, sooner or later you’d inexplicably wind up in the centre of Woolco, usually with a confused look on your face. The only thought being “How the fuck did I get here…” Then you’d go the “Red Grill” for a plate of fries and gravy. There would be a few other people that got caught in the whirling retailer vortex, scratching their heads and trying to enjoy some sort of greasy treat.
That must be it. American politics is like a greasy treat. It’s fast, easily accessible, and really, really bad for you. It makes perfect sense. To take it one step further, it is just as unsatisfying in the long run.
I visited Micah Wright’s website yesterday. For those of you who don’t know who he is, Micah is an artist, and has been running the “Propaganda Remix Project.” He takes Second World War and Cold War posters, and puts a new spin on them for the time that we live in. He has a good sense of humour and has used his conscience to make a statement. Anyway, he posts the hate mail that he gets, and some of it is really awful.
You’ll really be floored by the level of ignorance that these people spew. He regularly gets called things like a communist, a traitor, a faggot, and the list goes on and on. The usual “Archie Bunker” slobs bark at him with barbs like “Love it or leave it…” etc. It’s sad that they don’t realize it takes more conviction to stand up and question things than it does to piss on someone.
It’s sad that people can’t get past their own prejudices. We all have them, and I am no exception. For instance, I would be inclined to call the people that emailed Micah “hillbillies”, still others would get the label “dullards and rednecks”, then there are a few that could be stacked into the “Ketchup sammich eating trailer park trash” pile. But then again, I have no problem with the double standard, and I have no problem stooping to their level. I’m willing to fight fire with fire. I’m more than willing to get my hands dirty. Someone has to.
Liberals (and don’t get confused with a “party” here…) have been demonized and for some reason fail to strike back. Some might use the “Why stoop to that level?” argument. I think that’s bullshit. When you’re running for your life, seldom should you stop and be polite, or take the high road. There is absolutely no time for it.
It appears I’m off on a rant again…
Check out Micah's website...
www.micahwright.com
Perhaps leave him a nice message.
Sunday, July 24, 2005
07/24/05 Karl Rove is a F**ker...
I haven't posted for a few days. It's been nothing but pure laziness on my part, although I have been taking some time to do other things. I have a couple of books on the go (The new Harry Potter book, and the Solzhenitsyn one…), and I needed to take care of some things. (Like going to the dentist and getting some new clothes… ones that don't make me look like I've got a flappy ass.)
I needed some me time. Apparently I needed a lot of me time. In addition to kicking my tires and having some work done, I've been getting some much-wanted sleep. Happily the hallucinations caused by exhaustion have stopped.
Anyway… I've been kicking around some thoughts on the whole “Karl Rove must be punished” thing. For those of you people that live under a rock, and for some strange reason, don't know who he is, Rove is the key ingredient in Bush the lesser's successes.
Some say he's a demon, a villain, a zealot, and more astutely, the apex of power in the United States. All of which are sadly true. He's also best described as the Josef Goebbles of the present age, and like the afore mentioned Nazi, his ability to craft lies and half truths into something Neo Cons spout as gospel is uncanny.
The game for him is to defame and render democrats and other liberals useless. (Mind you, it was a pretty easy job these days… Especially when Howard Dean is the only pony in the stable…) so far he has succeeded with remarkable prowess. It almost makes Hitler's swath through Poland look childishly, clumsy and downright ham fisted.
Rove was rewarded for his efforts, and is now the deputy white house chief of staff, and a senior advisor to the President. (By advisor, I mean handler. Without Rove, Bush would still be a minor leaguer in politics…)
Oddly in a Physical sense, he's not that impressive. He's pudgy, with thinning hair and cheesy glasses. He has the look of a community college professor, and has a smirk on his face like he's been banging the hottest 20 year old in his class. (Gender non-specific…) You would never in a million years get the idea that he “runs” the presidency.
More importantly, he's the spin-doctor that put any remaining semblance of American democracy on life support. And you just know he's eyeing that plug, sizing it up, so when it's least expected he'll tug it out of the socket. This is a man who is willing to use every dirty trick and mistruth to get his desired result. He is everything that rots the core out from under the “New World.”
But I digress; Karl has done a bad thing. He leaked the name of a CIA operative to the media. That's a big “no no.” In fact it's been a legal taboo since the Reagan era. He did it as a way to punish her family, because her husband, who is a retired ambassador, discovered that Iraq was not in fact purchasing “Yellow Cake” uranium and he foolishly let the world know the truth. Not only was it wrong, but also it proves that Rove is a bit of a vindictive cocksucker.
What kind of a man goes out of his way to deliberately endanger someone to prove a point? The answer can only be “An EVIL one.”
Worse still, after promising the media that whoever was responsible for the leaked information would no longer work for the white house, Bush recanted when Rove admitted it was him. Bush should no longer have any shred of credibility left. The longer Rove stays, the longer Bush will suffer in the polls. (Not that it matters much…)
Not since Nixon has America has such a dishonest government. With times being what they are, (which is an awful lot like the Vietnam era…) It really surprises me that there aren't people in the streets, and mass riots over this.
Anyway now I'm just ranting… and I need to sleep.
More later…
End of Transmission
I needed some me time. Apparently I needed a lot of me time. In addition to kicking my tires and having some work done, I've been getting some much-wanted sleep. Happily the hallucinations caused by exhaustion have stopped.
Anyway… I've been kicking around some thoughts on the whole “Karl Rove must be punished” thing. For those of you people that live under a rock, and for some strange reason, don't know who he is, Rove is the key ingredient in Bush the lesser's successes.
Some say he's a demon, a villain, a zealot, and more astutely, the apex of power in the United States. All of which are sadly true. He's also best described as the Josef Goebbles of the present age, and like the afore mentioned Nazi, his ability to craft lies and half truths into something Neo Cons spout as gospel is uncanny.
The game for him is to defame and render democrats and other liberals useless. (Mind you, it was a pretty easy job these days… Especially when Howard Dean is the only pony in the stable…) so far he has succeeded with remarkable prowess. It almost makes Hitler's swath through Poland look childishly, clumsy and downright ham fisted.
Rove was rewarded for his efforts, and is now the deputy white house chief of staff, and a senior advisor to the President. (By advisor, I mean handler. Without Rove, Bush would still be a minor leaguer in politics…)
Oddly in a Physical sense, he's not that impressive. He's pudgy, with thinning hair and cheesy glasses. He has the look of a community college professor, and has a smirk on his face like he's been banging the hottest 20 year old in his class. (Gender non-specific…) You would never in a million years get the idea that he “runs” the presidency.
More importantly, he's the spin-doctor that put any remaining semblance of American democracy on life support. And you just know he's eyeing that plug, sizing it up, so when it's least expected he'll tug it out of the socket. This is a man who is willing to use every dirty trick and mistruth to get his desired result. He is everything that rots the core out from under the “New World.”
But I digress; Karl has done a bad thing. He leaked the name of a CIA operative to the media. That's a big “no no.” In fact it's been a legal taboo since the Reagan era. He did it as a way to punish her family, because her husband, who is a retired ambassador, discovered that Iraq was not in fact purchasing “Yellow Cake” uranium and he foolishly let the world know the truth. Not only was it wrong, but also it proves that Rove is a bit of a vindictive cocksucker.
What kind of a man goes out of his way to deliberately endanger someone to prove a point? The answer can only be “An EVIL one.”
Worse still, after promising the media that whoever was responsible for the leaked information would no longer work for the white house, Bush recanted when Rove admitted it was him. Bush should no longer have any shred of credibility left. The longer Rove stays, the longer Bush will suffer in the polls. (Not that it matters much…)
Not since Nixon has America has such a dishonest government. With times being what they are, (which is an awful lot like the Vietnam era…) It really surprises me that there aren't people in the streets, and mass riots over this.
Anyway now I'm just ranting… and I need to sleep.
More later…
End of Transmission
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Alkaline Trio - Crimson
B0009IW8VM.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
The musical pick of the week. This is a good record. One of my brothers turned me on to them.
They sort of remind me of Killing Joke for some reason. Perhaps it's because this disc is moody.
It's strong mid tempo pop punk, but at no point is there too much sugar.
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
07/19/05
I feel great (You could even say both hale and hearty…). I got to sleep late, but it seems to have had no effect on me. I caught myself humming “The Ladybug’s Picnic” on my way to work. I’m not sure why my brain decided to dredge that one up, but it made me smile. Then it got stuck in my head. It has become like some sort of musical version of typhus. It just won’t stop.
Some people are tortured by their demons (Vincent VanGogh, Charles Manson, Jackson Pollock…) me, I’m tortured by a catchy little tune from Sesame Street about insects. If it weren’t so very annoying, it would be funny. It’s like the Zapruder film sequence in the movie JFK. “Back and to the left… Back and to the left… Back and to the left…”
Mind you, it’s not as if I have steeped into the mouth of madness. (Yet…) I just hate having shit repeat itself in my head. Apparently though I’m not alone. According to an American university professor, a song getting stuck in our head happens to roughly 97 percent of the population.
Apparently it’s a sort of "cognitive itch" - the mental equivalent of an itchy back. The brain replays the song over and over again to “scratch the itch.”
Some people are tortured by their demons (Vincent VanGogh, Charles Manson, Jackson Pollock…) me, I’m tortured by a catchy little tune from Sesame Street about insects. If it weren’t so very annoying, it would be funny. It’s like the Zapruder film sequence in the movie JFK. “Back and to the left… Back and to the left… Back and to the left…”
Mind you, it’s not as if I have steeped into the mouth of madness. (Yet…) I just hate having shit repeat itself in my head. Apparently though I’m not alone. According to an American university professor, a song getting stuck in our head happens to roughly 97 percent of the population.
Apparently it’s a sort of "cognitive itch" - the mental equivalent of an itchy back. The brain replays the song over and over again to “scratch the itch.”
Saturday, July 16, 2005
07/15/05
For a day off, today still wound up being busy. I had to go to the office to pick up my pay cheque. (We still operate in the Stone Age.) Then I had to tear off to Yuks to pick up another cheque, then off to the bank.
To get from one destination to another, I decided the train was the best option. Weird things happen to me on the train. I try to keep to myself… I really do. I don’t care for idle conversation. I like to read, or get lost in my thoughts, but somehow, there is always some freak that I accidentally make eye contact with. Apparently I haven’t mastered that glazed over look that most people have on the train. Without fail, I seem to manage to attract people who want to spread the “word” or are so mentally gone that they wish to explain the merits of Scooby Doo’s “acting” abilities. (True story… but for another time.)
Today was no exception. There was a pagan (ish) woman with a hair lip, who had managed to slather (I wish this was an exaggeration…) herself with “Mott’s Clamato” rub on tattoos. She had just left the Stampede grounds and was carrying a couple of brooms. (Irony see… life is truly filled with irony…) She wanted to chat. I wanted to read. I had just put my nose into my book (Alexander Solzhenitsyn’s “The First Circle”) when she tapped me on the shoulder. (I hate… and I mean hate to be touched by complete strangers…)
Rather than attempting a conversation, I just looked at her and furled my brow. I have found over the years that there are few things as dismissive as an arched eyebrow. This however, was not a deterrent for her.
Pagan Woman: It sure is hot…
Me: (Eyebrow still arched…) um yeah…
Pagan Woman: Is that a good book?
Me: I dunno… I just started trying to READ it…
Pagan Woman: Alexander Sol… (From this point the attempt at pronunciation became painful.)
Me: Solzhenitsyn…
Pagan Woman: Never heard of him… What kind of name is that? (Because of the hair lip, you couldn’t see her lips move… It was like looking a ventriloquist without the dummy.)
Me: Russian…
Pagan Woman: What’s it about?
Me: Well that’s what I’d like to find out… So… (And I put my nose back into the book.)
Now you’d think after that, the conversation would be over… Right? Wrong!!!
Pagan Woman: So you have no idea what it’s about?
Me: Look… I just want to read my book.
Pagan Woman: oh… It sure is hot… (I just ignored her from this point on.)
Then happily she got up, (Brooms and all) and moved to a different seat.
Later on, once I finally finished my errands, I went to the Chinook Mall to fart around for a while.
I poked around in the record store; I was waiting for Erin, Maya, and Michelle to show up. We decided to go to the movies. Tonight was the opening for “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.” I really wanted to see it, because as a child, it was one of my favorite books. When we lived in Montreal, my dad used to read it to my sister and me. He must have read it to us 10 times. But for as much as I wanted to see it, Erin went loopy for it. I was pretty sure that she might have exploded at one point. I loved hearing her giggle throughout the Oompa Loompa scenes.
Anyway, it was really good. I thought Tim Burton managed to make it look like I had always imagined it to be. Johnny Depp made Willy Wonka fantastically quirky and awkward.
After the movie, we headed off to the bookstore so Erin and Michelle could get their copies of the new Harry Potter book. The place was packed to the gills with kids. Chapters had turned the whole thing into an event. There was face painting, and a treasure hunt. There were “stations” strategically located around the store, where the kids got read different parts of previous books. It was total madness. You couldn’t help but crash into kids. It was reminiscent of trying to navigate “Superstore” on a Saturday afternoon.
While I’m not the most patient person in the world, I managed to remain remarkably restrained. I just tried to keep to the sections that held my interest.
I found a neat book about Russia. It’s called Broken Empire. It’s about the socioeconomic changes since the collapse of communism. I think I’m going to enjoy reading it.
Anyway… It’s bedtime for me.
To get from one destination to another, I decided the train was the best option. Weird things happen to me on the train. I try to keep to myself… I really do. I don’t care for idle conversation. I like to read, or get lost in my thoughts, but somehow, there is always some freak that I accidentally make eye contact with. Apparently I haven’t mastered that glazed over look that most people have on the train. Without fail, I seem to manage to attract people who want to spread the “word” or are so mentally gone that they wish to explain the merits of Scooby Doo’s “acting” abilities. (True story… but for another time.)
Today was no exception. There was a pagan (ish) woman with a hair lip, who had managed to slather (I wish this was an exaggeration…) herself with “Mott’s Clamato” rub on tattoos. She had just left the Stampede grounds and was carrying a couple of brooms. (Irony see… life is truly filled with irony…) She wanted to chat. I wanted to read. I had just put my nose into my book (Alexander Solzhenitsyn’s “The First Circle”) when she tapped me on the shoulder. (I hate… and I mean hate to be touched by complete strangers…)
Rather than attempting a conversation, I just looked at her and furled my brow. I have found over the years that there are few things as dismissive as an arched eyebrow. This however, was not a deterrent for her.
Pagan Woman: It sure is hot…
Me: (Eyebrow still arched…) um yeah…
Pagan Woman: Is that a good book?
Me: I dunno… I just started trying to READ it…
Pagan Woman: Alexander Sol… (From this point the attempt at pronunciation became painful.)
Me: Solzhenitsyn…
Pagan Woman: Never heard of him… What kind of name is that? (Because of the hair lip, you couldn’t see her lips move… It was like looking a ventriloquist without the dummy.)
Me: Russian…
Pagan Woman: What’s it about?
Me: Well that’s what I’d like to find out… So… (And I put my nose back into the book.)
Now you’d think after that, the conversation would be over… Right? Wrong!!!
Pagan Woman: So you have no idea what it’s about?
Me: Look… I just want to read my book.
Pagan Woman: oh… It sure is hot… (I just ignored her from this point on.)
Then happily she got up, (Brooms and all) and moved to a different seat.
Later on, once I finally finished my errands, I went to the Chinook Mall to fart around for a while.
I poked around in the record store; I was waiting for Erin, Maya, and Michelle to show up. We decided to go to the movies. Tonight was the opening for “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.” I really wanted to see it, because as a child, it was one of my favorite books. When we lived in Montreal, my dad used to read it to my sister and me. He must have read it to us 10 times. But for as much as I wanted to see it, Erin went loopy for it. I was pretty sure that she might have exploded at one point. I loved hearing her giggle throughout the Oompa Loompa scenes.
Anyway, it was really good. I thought Tim Burton managed to make it look like I had always imagined it to be. Johnny Depp made Willy Wonka fantastically quirky and awkward.
After the movie, we headed off to the bookstore so Erin and Michelle could get their copies of the new Harry Potter book. The place was packed to the gills with kids. Chapters had turned the whole thing into an event. There was face painting, and a treasure hunt. There were “stations” strategically located around the store, where the kids got read different parts of previous books. It was total madness. You couldn’t help but crash into kids. It was reminiscent of trying to navigate “Superstore” on a Saturday afternoon.
While I’m not the most patient person in the world, I managed to remain remarkably restrained. I just tried to keep to the sections that held my interest.
I found a neat book about Russia. It’s called Broken Empire. It’s about the socioeconomic changes since the collapse of communism. I think I’m going to enjoy reading it.
Anyway… It’s bedtime for me.
Ben Folds - Songs For Silverman
B0007WF1XM.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
Another Gem... Ben Folds just gets better and better.
The whole record stands up on it's own.
Just buy it.
The Dropkick Murphys - Warrior's Code
B0009IOR0C.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
I love this disc. It's the perfect album for a night of drunken mayhem. If there was a recipie for "Irish soccer hooligans", this record would be a significant ingredient.
Punk rock wtih accordion and bagpipes, how could you ever go wrong?
Thursday, July 14, 2005
07/13/05 Just some shit...
Here are some things that have been rattling about in my head for the last little while.
1) I hate clowns… I think anyone that decides to become a clown needs a lot of “Special” help. John Wayne Gacey loved clowns… Need I really say more? If a clown showed up at my doorstep, my first reaction would be to punch it.
2) The first rock and roll album I ever got was AC/DC’s “Let There be Rock” I think I still actually have it somewhere. I played the shit out of that record. I was 11 at the time. The next record I got was less of a classic. Styx “Kilroy was Here” To this day, every time I hear “Mr. Roboto” I cringe. I think there may have been an Air Supply record in there too, but the less said about that the better.
3) I love Strawberry Slurpees. Sadly they have disappeared.
4) There are few foods better than a good hotdog. Especially if it has corn relish on it. For some reason they always taste the best coming from one of those carts at 3 in the morning. No Sour Kraut though… That stuff is evil.
5) People who are too into religion freak me out. Especially when they are compelled to recruit others. I just can’t muster that kind of enthusiasm for anything. (There is a difference between belief, and fanatical devotion…)
6) I always wanted to build one of those model rockets. The kind that you can actually launch.
7) I am perversely entertained by politics. Regardless of my own beliefs, it amuses me to see just how easy it is to push people’s buttons when it comes to politics. All it takes is a statement like “Karl Rove is a vampire… or Stephen Harper is impotent” and people unfurl…(Even though both statements are gospel.)
8) I believe that music really is food for the soul. Pop music on the other hand is fodder for the masses. The world is top heavy with starlets, divas and manufactured musical swill. We could have all happily lived our lives without Brittney, JLO, PDiddy, Missy Elliot and Justin Timberlake. Bob Marley, Kurt Cobain, Keith Moon and scores of others must be turning in their graves.
9) The most amusing Heavy Metal band ever is “Judas Priest” (It’s because they take themselves way too serious. (My favourite Heavy Metal band however is Iron Maiden, mostly because they have a brilliant sense of humour.
10) I am considering looking more deeply into Buddhism. I am very attracted to some of its principles. The realization that a physical object is just the manifestation of an idea bakes my noodle.
11) People who think that they are vampires amuse me. That’s some very funny shit. This just in… Vampires aren’t real. Neither are the boogieman, Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny. (No matter what Anne Rice says…) I’m going to go out on a limb here and say, “That takes a special kind of lonely to be able to sit in a dentist’s chair and have pointy teeth installed. Good luck with that…”
12) My new favourite music artist is Kinnie Starr. The song “Alright” sends shivers down my spine. She’s pretty damn cute too.
13) I dislike game show hosts. In my most humble estimation they are barely a notch about used car salesmen, or people who work in Stereo shops. I want to hold Alex Trebec down and shave off his moustache.
14) I believe that the “Middle East” is a powder keg that North Americans have set off. We will be reeling from its ramifications for the next century. It’s too bad we suck at dealing with it too. It’s kinda like using water bombers full of white gas to put out a forest fire.
15) The war on terrorism is being fought in exactly the wrong way. Instead of engaging in combat with rogue nations, we should be hunting the terrorists and treating them as criminals… not terrorists. The sooner we learn to not give them a vaulted status, the better we’ll fare in the “war.” It is more demoralizing to treat them as common criminals. If we refuse to recognize that their deeds have any power over us, the easier it will be to defeat them.
1) I hate clowns… I think anyone that decides to become a clown needs a lot of “Special” help. John Wayne Gacey loved clowns… Need I really say more? If a clown showed up at my doorstep, my first reaction would be to punch it.
2) The first rock and roll album I ever got was AC/DC’s “Let There be Rock” I think I still actually have it somewhere. I played the shit out of that record. I was 11 at the time. The next record I got was less of a classic. Styx “Kilroy was Here” To this day, every time I hear “Mr. Roboto” I cringe. I think there may have been an Air Supply record in there too, but the less said about that the better.
3) I love Strawberry Slurpees. Sadly they have disappeared.
4) There are few foods better than a good hotdog. Especially if it has corn relish on it. For some reason they always taste the best coming from one of those carts at 3 in the morning. No Sour Kraut though… That stuff is evil.
5) People who are too into religion freak me out. Especially when they are compelled to recruit others. I just can’t muster that kind of enthusiasm for anything. (There is a difference between belief, and fanatical devotion…)
6) I always wanted to build one of those model rockets. The kind that you can actually launch.
7) I am perversely entertained by politics. Regardless of my own beliefs, it amuses me to see just how easy it is to push people’s buttons when it comes to politics. All it takes is a statement like “Karl Rove is a vampire… or Stephen Harper is impotent” and people unfurl…(Even though both statements are gospel.)
8) I believe that music really is food for the soul. Pop music on the other hand is fodder for the masses. The world is top heavy with starlets, divas and manufactured musical swill. We could have all happily lived our lives without Brittney, JLO, PDiddy, Missy Elliot and Justin Timberlake. Bob Marley, Kurt Cobain, Keith Moon and scores of others must be turning in their graves.
9) The most amusing Heavy Metal band ever is “Judas Priest” (It’s because they take themselves way too serious. (My favourite Heavy Metal band however is Iron Maiden, mostly because they have a brilliant sense of humour.
10) I am considering looking more deeply into Buddhism. I am very attracted to some of its principles. The realization that a physical object is just the manifestation of an idea bakes my noodle.
11) People who think that they are vampires amuse me. That’s some very funny shit. This just in… Vampires aren’t real. Neither are the boogieman, Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny. (No matter what Anne Rice says…) I’m going to go out on a limb here and say, “That takes a special kind of lonely to be able to sit in a dentist’s chair and have pointy teeth installed. Good luck with that…”
12) My new favourite music artist is Kinnie Starr. The song “Alright” sends shivers down my spine. She’s pretty damn cute too.
13) I dislike game show hosts. In my most humble estimation they are barely a notch about used car salesmen, or people who work in Stereo shops. I want to hold Alex Trebec down and shave off his moustache.
14) I believe that the “Middle East” is a powder keg that North Americans have set off. We will be reeling from its ramifications for the next century. It’s too bad we suck at dealing with it too. It’s kinda like using water bombers full of white gas to put out a forest fire.
15) The war on terrorism is being fought in exactly the wrong way. Instead of engaging in combat with rogue nations, we should be hunting the terrorists and treating them as criminals… not terrorists. The sooner we learn to not give them a vaulted status, the better we’ll fare in the “war.” It is more demoralizing to treat them as common criminals. If we refuse to recognize that their deeds have any power over us, the easier it will be to defeat them.
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
07/11/05 The People's Glorious Republic of Marcus...
I have decided that it’s time for some sort of benevolent dictatorship to run “Fortress North America.” I have also decided that I will throw my hat into that ring. I nominated myself to become the new fearless leader. Hell… given who’s running the show these days, I suspect that I couldn’t do any worse.
Perhaps since others have imposed their will on me and mine, maybe I’ll be able to do the same thing. I have some ideas, and I think they would be of more benefit.
My first act would be to replace the three existing national anthems with the immortal classic “Back In Black” by AC / DC. I love that song. It’s strong, and it kind of says, “Hi… You may have noticed that we’ve made some changes.” (I like that.)
Next, the flags have to go. They all suck. They’re all so bloody BORING and all so terribly traditional. Who doesn’t use the colours red white or blue? Instead I was thinking of a yellow flag with a bunch of bananas on it. We’ll called it “Glorious Old Bananas” or something like that… I’ll work on that one… (Who amongst us needs stars and maple leaves when they can have fruit?)
That brings us to policy. I would create some new ministries and make up some totally new ones.
The Propaganda Ministry. (No beating around the bush with this one… I’m willing to call a spade a spade…) It will be responsible to me and me alone. Their job is to tell my “children” that all is well. I already have a few people in mind for this post.
The Ministry of The People’s Happiness. I love the sound of this one… They will work hand in hand with the Propaganda ministry. Their only aim is to please. We need to put smiles on each and every North American’s face. As a side benefit, they will be able to dispense psychoactive drugs free of charge to all my “Children”
The Department of The Navy and the Coast Guard will be amalgamated. The New ministry is to be called “That dirty bunch of Rum Soaked Sea Dogs and Pirates.” Just wait till you see the new letterhead… It’s truly smashing.
INS, Homeland Security, The RCMP, and The FBI, Customs and Revenue Canada, and their Mexican counterparts will also be amalgamated. They will be newly named “The Keep The Bad People Out Police” Their motto, translated from Latin is “Yes we really can do this to you…”
We also need a name for our new super country. Marcusland has a good ring to it… So does “The People’s Glorious Republic of Marcus…” Again I’ll have to ponder on it for a while.
Anyway…
Perhaps since others have imposed their will on me and mine, maybe I’ll be able to do the same thing. I have some ideas, and I think they would be of more benefit.
My first act would be to replace the three existing national anthems with the immortal classic “Back In Black” by AC / DC. I love that song. It’s strong, and it kind of says, “Hi… You may have noticed that we’ve made some changes.” (I like that.)
Next, the flags have to go. They all suck. They’re all so bloody BORING and all so terribly traditional. Who doesn’t use the colours red white or blue? Instead I was thinking of a yellow flag with a bunch of bananas on it. We’ll called it “Glorious Old Bananas” or something like that… I’ll work on that one… (Who amongst us needs stars and maple leaves when they can have fruit?)
That brings us to policy. I would create some new ministries and make up some totally new ones.
The Propaganda Ministry. (No beating around the bush with this one… I’m willing to call a spade a spade…) It will be responsible to me and me alone. Their job is to tell my “children” that all is well. I already have a few people in mind for this post.
The Ministry of The People’s Happiness. I love the sound of this one… They will work hand in hand with the Propaganda ministry. Their only aim is to please. We need to put smiles on each and every North American’s face. As a side benefit, they will be able to dispense psychoactive drugs free of charge to all my “Children”
The Department of The Navy and the Coast Guard will be amalgamated. The New ministry is to be called “That dirty bunch of Rum Soaked Sea Dogs and Pirates.” Just wait till you see the new letterhead… It’s truly smashing.
INS, Homeland Security, The RCMP, and The FBI, Customs and Revenue Canada, and their Mexican counterparts will also be amalgamated. They will be newly named “The Keep The Bad People Out Police” Their motto, translated from Latin is “Yes we really can do this to you…”
We also need a name for our new super country. Marcusland has a good ring to it… So does “The People’s Glorious Republic of Marcus…” Again I’ll have to ponder on it for a while.
Anyway…
Friday, July 08, 2005
07/08/05
Today is the first day of the Calgary Stampede. For the uninitiated, The “Greatest Outdoor Show on Earth” starts with a big parade. Which is great right? Who doesn’t love a parade? On the list of humanity’s most beloved things, I believe parades fall somewhere in between pirates and deep fried dessert treats. My only issue with the parade is this. It starts at 7:30 am. What undead cowpoke decided on that start time?
Clearly the wild-hearted spirit of west doesn’t involve sleeping.
As a pedestrian, it matters little to me that the parade clogs up the downtown on a Friday morning. (I can get behind the chaos…) Truthfully, I like all the people milling about. I just find it hard to get that excited about anything before 10am.
While I’m not the biggest fan of the Stampede Exhibition itself, I do like what happens to the city in that 10-day period. Calgary pulls the stick out of its ass and has a good old time. For 10 days people are a little more human. Sure it’s a little odd to see Asians dressed as cowboys, and most people look really silly in a Stetson, but it’s fun. Even if it just reinforces stereotypes of the west.
Other things…
Tomorrow I’m going to do a show in Red Deer. It’s been about 3 years since I last played at the legion hall there. I’m excited. I get to go with Jasen Fredricksen and Dave Nystrom. I like those guys a lot, so this should be fun.
Tonight, Erin and I are going to the movies. I think we are going to see Batman Begins. I have already seen it, but I loved it, so I am more than willing to go again. I think I have a hopeless addiction to popcorn. (Well, from the theatre…)
Yesterday I mentioned a graphic novel called “V for Vendetta” I discovered that it is going to be a movie. The producers of the Matrix have just finished up principal photography, with November 5th as the release date. For those of you who don’t understand the significance of the date, it’s Guy Fawkes Day… or Bonfire night.
Given the nature of the story, it couldn’t be a more appropriate day.
"Remember, remember, the fifth of November,
Gunpowder, treason and plot. We see no reason why
Gunpowder treason should ever be forgot!"
Anyway…
Clearly the wild-hearted spirit of west doesn’t involve sleeping.
As a pedestrian, it matters little to me that the parade clogs up the downtown on a Friday morning. (I can get behind the chaos…) Truthfully, I like all the people milling about. I just find it hard to get that excited about anything before 10am.
While I’m not the biggest fan of the Stampede Exhibition itself, I do like what happens to the city in that 10-day period. Calgary pulls the stick out of its ass and has a good old time. For 10 days people are a little more human. Sure it’s a little odd to see Asians dressed as cowboys, and most people look really silly in a Stetson, but it’s fun. Even if it just reinforces stereotypes of the west.
Other things…
Tomorrow I’m going to do a show in Red Deer. It’s been about 3 years since I last played at the legion hall there. I’m excited. I get to go with Jasen Fredricksen and Dave Nystrom. I like those guys a lot, so this should be fun.
Tonight, Erin and I are going to the movies. I think we are going to see Batman Begins. I have already seen it, but I loved it, so I am more than willing to go again. I think I have a hopeless addiction to popcorn. (Well, from the theatre…)
Yesterday I mentioned a graphic novel called “V for Vendetta” I discovered that it is going to be a movie. The producers of the Matrix have just finished up principal photography, with November 5th as the release date. For those of you who don’t understand the significance of the date, it’s Guy Fawkes Day… or Bonfire night.
Given the nature of the story, it couldn’t be a more appropriate day.
"Remember, remember, the fifth of November,
Gunpowder, treason and plot. We see no reason why
Gunpowder treason should ever be forgot!"
Anyway…
07/07/05
I’ve had a great swell of emotion for the people of England today. I, for some reason, feel the need to express my most heart-felt condolences. Not that it helps… I can’t imagine the horror that these people must be going through at this time. In a rare moment, I even prayed today. I have been going through the same range of feelings that I did during 9/11.
Regardless of the rationale that was employed to conceive of this act, it is nothing short of insidious brutality. I believe that the people responsible must be apprehended and punished. Nothing that I can think of justifies this. Nothing.
I understand that for every action, there is a reaction. For every trade tower there is an Afghanistan, and for every Iraq there is a London. When is this going to stop? At what point will common sense prevail? Is there ever going to be a time when a sense of human decency prevents us from butchering one another?
Likely not I suppose.
I found myself looking at a graphic novel called V for Vendetta. An astute and talented man named Alan Moore wrote it. In a nutshell, it’s about a post apocalyptic England, where fascism is on the rise, and one man manages to take the government to task. It’s a very violent, but equally fascinating story. The lines between good and evil have been muddied to the point where it becomes difficult to figure out whom to root for.
That is where I am in all of this. I’m not sure whom to root for. The first world is broken. I’m not sure it’s even fixable. I’m not surprised that others hate us. We’ve become decadent, and greedy. We live in a wasteful society that consumes more than we need to. (And by insane margins…)
I am convinced that this terror thing is a case of double jeopardy. Both sides have fucked us all. The powers that be do not represent my interests. (Hell, of all the G8 leaders, there are 7 I didn’t even get a chance to vote for, and they get to make decision that will affect me… How does that work?) They never have. But the terrorists threaten the security of my world.
We need to find a way to sort this out. There has to be a more fair way of dealing with the conflicts between us. Otherwise, sooner or later, the jig will be up. Humanity will become like the dinosaurs, just a footnote in earth’s history.
Anyway… This is all reactionary blather on my part.
And for those of you that have read V for Vendetta…
England Prevails.
Regardless of the rationale that was employed to conceive of this act, it is nothing short of insidious brutality. I believe that the people responsible must be apprehended and punished. Nothing that I can think of justifies this. Nothing.
I understand that for every action, there is a reaction. For every trade tower there is an Afghanistan, and for every Iraq there is a London. When is this going to stop? At what point will common sense prevail? Is there ever going to be a time when a sense of human decency prevents us from butchering one another?
Likely not I suppose.
I found myself looking at a graphic novel called V for Vendetta. An astute and talented man named Alan Moore wrote it. In a nutshell, it’s about a post apocalyptic England, where fascism is on the rise, and one man manages to take the government to task. It’s a very violent, but equally fascinating story. The lines between good and evil have been muddied to the point where it becomes difficult to figure out whom to root for.
That is where I am in all of this. I’m not sure whom to root for. The first world is broken. I’m not sure it’s even fixable. I’m not surprised that others hate us. We’ve become decadent, and greedy. We live in a wasteful society that consumes more than we need to. (And by insane margins…)
I am convinced that this terror thing is a case of double jeopardy. Both sides have fucked us all. The powers that be do not represent my interests. (Hell, of all the G8 leaders, there are 7 I didn’t even get a chance to vote for, and they get to make decision that will affect me… How does that work?) They never have. But the terrorists threaten the security of my world.
We need to find a way to sort this out. There has to be a more fair way of dealing with the conflicts between us. Otherwise, sooner or later, the jig will be up. Humanity will become like the dinosaurs, just a footnote in earth’s history.
Anyway… This is all reactionary blather on my part.
And for those of you that have read V for Vendetta…
England Prevails.
Thursday, July 07, 2005
07/06/05
It’ s 3:15 in the morning. It’s pretty quiet. The only noise, other than the pressing of these keys, is the sound of a street cleaner making its rounds. It has a bit of a dull, almost white noise kind of hum to it. It’s not on my street, by the sounds of it; it’s a couple of blocks away.
I have often thought it would be cool to have a job like that. The kind of job that lets you work late at night, and alleviates the need to be social. I like that idea. Well mostly. More to the point, the need to be social with complete strangers. I’m not that keen on it. Usually I find meeting people a little painful, unless they give off some sort of a disarming charm. If there is no sense of human warmth, I’m not comfortable. I get really fidgety. (It’s sort of like how a dog has to sniff you out before it decides how acceptable you are…) This can however be rectified by the addition of Scotch. Ply me with the water of life, and sadly, then I can find interest in people that would normally drive me mad.
There is something to be said for the quiet. It’s in those increasingly rare moments, when my brain unwinds. I get to think without the noise pollution that my head is constantly infected with. There are no fires to put out; there is no manic need to get something done. It’s brilliant.
I have detected another noise. It is the ticking sound of my wristwatch. Tick… Tick… Tick…
I have often thought it would be cool to have a job like that. The kind of job that lets you work late at night, and alleviates the need to be social. I like that idea. Well mostly. More to the point, the need to be social with complete strangers. I’m not that keen on it. Usually I find meeting people a little painful, unless they give off some sort of a disarming charm. If there is no sense of human warmth, I’m not comfortable. I get really fidgety. (It’s sort of like how a dog has to sniff you out before it decides how acceptable you are…) This can however be rectified by the addition of Scotch. Ply me with the water of life, and sadly, then I can find interest in people that would normally drive me mad.
There is something to be said for the quiet. It’s in those increasingly rare moments, when my brain unwinds. I get to think without the noise pollution that my head is constantly infected with. There are no fires to put out; there is no manic need to get something done. It’s brilliant.
I have detected another noise. It is the ticking sound of my wristwatch. Tick… Tick… Tick…
Monday, July 04, 2005
07/05/05
I remember why I hate open mics. It strikes me that they are only good for mining a phrase here, and an idea there. There's not much in the way of useful crowd response, so it's not like you can really test a joke.
Nothing says "stand up" quite like a big empty room, (if you discount the Koreans munching on chicken wings in the back) It's not a place to learn your craft. It's a place to learn humility. That's it. There is nothing more to gain from it.
It is most likely that if you kill at an open mic, then you are probably the funniest guy in your office.
I have nothing else to offer this evening…
Nothing says "stand up" quite like a big empty room, (if you discount the Koreans munching on chicken wings in the back) It's not a place to learn your craft. It's a place to learn humility. That's it. There is nothing more to gain from it.
It is most likely that if you kill at an open mic, then you are probably the funniest guy in your office.
I have nothing else to offer this evening…
07/04/05 Maybe The Problem is You...
First, I’d like to thank all those that voted (either by email, or by leaving comments.) It was a tight race between “Disfigured Skating, A Gentleman’s Handbook” and “Maybe the Problem is You…” The latter wins by the narrowest of margins.
Now with having a title, I can proceed with the artwork. The Cd itself will be ready in the next two weeks. (Provided that I can get this fucking piece of shit scanner to work… HP my ass…)
But I digress…
It’s early, and I have tons of work to do.
So my possums, I will post something with a little more depth later on.
End of Transmission…
Now with having a title, I can proceed with the artwork. The Cd itself will be ready in the next two weeks. (Provided that I can get this fucking piece of shit scanner to work… HP my ass…)
But I digress…
It’s early, and I have tons of work to do.
So my possums, I will post something with a little more depth later on.
End of Transmission…
Friday, July 01, 2005
07/01/05
I just spent the last hour at the gym in my building. I’m trying to beat the 25-pound plateau that I seem to have gotten stuck at. I’m blasting at it with as much cardio as I can manage. I’m wiped, and I smell like an old hockey bag, but I feel like I’ve accomplished something. Tomorrow I’m getting right back on that horse. I am a man determined.
I also managed to get some decent sleep. That’s what I want out of my Canada day. Just a really good rest, and that’s about it. I have no real desire to celebrate. Don’t get me wrong, I love being Canadian and all, but really it’s just the place that I’m from. I don’t have an over inflated sense of pragmatic patriotism. I’ll leave that to the Archie Bunker Type slobs. (I realize that’s a fictitious American character… but it seemed to fit the stereotype I was going for.) They seem to get off on it. I do not.
The only time I get really wrapped up in patriotism is when hockey supremacy is on the line. This may be hypocritical to some, but I don’t give a shit. I’m willing to live with it.
I’d have to say that my expectations for our nation’s birthday have been dramatically lowered over the years. To me is has become as anti climactic as New Year’s Eve. I just don’t really care that much. For some reason I’m unable to get excited when the big red ball drops, or the clock strikes 12. Perhaps it’s just a ploy to unload cheap champagne on the masses.
I find myself wondered if most people fake the excitement. I’ve forced the smile through gritted teeth, and sang the song with a curse under my breath. How many of us are there? How many are mixing it up at the party? How many would rather be doing something else? Too many times, I’ve struggled to get that taxi at 4am.
It all just seems too forced to me.
On to other stuff…
I started cutting together a promo video last night. I really liked my performance on the tape, but I didn’t realize just how fat I had gotten. I looked like the Micheline man. (More to the point, the Micheline man in a pink shirt. Fuck…what was I thinking?) Just call me BIB. Anyway, I decided to pitch it, and re-shoot in the fall. The audio however is still useable. I think it will become the CD I have been promising for eons. I’ve been scraping together some possible titles for it. This is the list I have come up with. I’m counting on all of you readers to vote on the best one.
1) Maybe The Problem is you.
2) A tad Overweight, But Olive eyes to die for.
3) The Scrapes of Wrath
4) I used to be Fat.
5) Perhaps you should Floss…
6) Marcus Beaubier – Live at Yuk Yuks
7) Disfigured Skating, A Gentleman's Handbook...
8) What gives you the right to put out a CD…
9) New and Improved Flavour…
Anyway, Just leave a comment on which one you like best, and I'll use some sort of scientific method to calculate the results.
I also managed to get some decent sleep. That’s what I want out of my Canada day. Just a really good rest, and that’s about it. I have no real desire to celebrate. Don’t get me wrong, I love being Canadian and all, but really it’s just the place that I’m from. I don’t have an over inflated sense of pragmatic patriotism. I’ll leave that to the Archie Bunker Type slobs. (I realize that’s a fictitious American character… but it seemed to fit the stereotype I was going for.) They seem to get off on it. I do not.
The only time I get really wrapped up in patriotism is when hockey supremacy is on the line. This may be hypocritical to some, but I don’t give a shit. I’m willing to live with it.
I’d have to say that my expectations for our nation’s birthday have been dramatically lowered over the years. To me is has become as anti climactic as New Year’s Eve. I just don’t really care that much. For some reason I’m unable to get excited when the big red ball drops, or the clock strikes 12. Perhaps it’s just a ploy to unload cheap champagne on the masses.
I find myself wondered if most people fake the excitement. I’ve forced the smile through gritted teeth, and sang the song with a curse under my breath. How many of us are there? How many are mixing it up at the party? How many would rather be doing something else? Too many times, I’ve struggled to get that taxi at 4am.
It all just seems too forced to me.
On to other stuff…
I started cutting together a promo video last night. I really liked my performance on the tape, but I didn’t realize just how fat I had gotten. I looked like the Micheline man. (More to the point, the Micheline man in a pink shirt. Fuck…what was I thinking?) Just call me BIB. Anyway, I decided to pitch it, and re-shoot in the fall. The audio however is still useable. I think it will become the CD I have been promising for eons. I’ve been scraping together some possible titles for it. This is the list I have come up with. I’m counting on all of you readers to vote on the best one.
1) Maybe The Problem is you.
2) A tad Overweight, But Olive eyes to die for.
3) The Scrapes of Wrath
4) I used to be Fat.
5) Perhaps you should Floss…
6) Marcus Beaubier – Live at Yuk Yuks
7) Disfigured Skating, A Gentleman's Handbook...
8) What gives you the right to put out a CD…
9) New and Improved Flavour…
Anyway, Just leave a comment on which one you like best, and I'll use some sort of scientific method to calculate the results.
Thursday, June 30, 2005
06/30/05 Early Edition...
I’m having a nice quite Thursday evening. The eve of our nation’s birthday, finds me smoking Camels, drinking water out of a Pellegrino bottle, and humming along to The Arcade fire. Yes, It is a lovely moment.
I have spent the majority of my day running errands that until now had been largely forgotten about. I’m a last minute kind of guy. I know I shouldn’t be… Especially with the early bird getting the worm and all. (Or so I’m told is normally the case.) I’m one of those people that still actually prefer to go into the bank. I think its because I like to see what kind of people are waiting in the queue.
Everyone in the line has that “Aw… Fuck… can you get a move on it please?” look on their faces. Some of them are a little less glazed over than others, but no one looks thrilled to be at the bank.
The biggest hold up in the line comes from a homeless man who is trying to get the bank teller to accept all his unrolled change. He just kept pulling mounds and mounds of change from his pockets. The teller had a forced smile on her face. The manager strolled over and nodded to indicate that she should continue to put up with it. I found the whole thing amusing. The others did not.
One rather well dressed fellow, clinging to his briefcase, snaps… “This is bullshit… Why the fuck isn’t there an other teller on?”
I smiled, and kind of shrugged my shoulders. He just got angrier.
Briefcase Man: This is making me late for a meeting. This was just a waste of time. Huff (Rolls his eyes)… Fuck…
Me: I don’t mind waiting. I think it’s great that they are willing to give that poor fellow some attention… most people probably ignore him.
Briefcase Man: I don’t care… This just pisses me off…
Then came my turn, so I headed to the teller. She addressed me as Mr. Beaubier. She even pronounced my last name correctly. I love that. It never happens. In all the years that I have done stand up, I have had to correct nearly every MC at least once.
I finish up my business, and I can still hear the Briefcase man bitching from over by the “Special Clients” queue. It seems he got into the wrong line. I bet that burned his fuse just a little shorter.
Me: I hope your meeting goes well…
Briefcase man: Yeah Right… (Muffled voice…) This fucking line…
I open the door and escape out into the sunlight. Next stop, the post office.
It surprised me to find out just exactly how much time I actually spent in queues today. From the bank, to the post office, to Starbucks, to finally where I got my lunch, each one had a line. (For those of you who are interested, I had a BK Veggie Burger, Salad and a medium diet soda. I was amazed at how good the veggie burger was…)
In any case, I’m glad I brought my ipod. Music has always been a good pacifier for me. It keeps me patient. But I’m one of those people that spend so much time sifting through a song. I look for the little hooks in the music. A clever bass line, or a smart key change, and I become a puddle.
On to other stuff…
I had a fun show last night. The crowd was so quiet at the start of the show; I was convinced they were going to hate me. This was not the case at all. Holly told me that I would likely wake them out of their stupor. That was exactly what happened.
They just sat there like lumps for the first 3 acts. Then, as if I had just flipped a switch, they started to perk up and get into the show.
Anyway… enough babble from me…
End of Transmission.
I have spent the majority of my day running errands that until now had been largely forgotten about. I’m a last minute kind of guy. I know I shouldn’t be… Especially with the early bird getting the worm and all. (Or so I’m told is normally the case.) I’m one of those people that still actually prefer to go into the bank. I think its because I like to see what kind of people are waiting in the queue.
Everyone in the line has that “Aw… Fuck… can you get a move on it please?” look on their faces. Some of them are a little less glazed over than others, but no one looks thrilled to be at the bank.
The biggest hold up in the line comes from a homeless man who is trying to get the bank teller to accept all his unrolled change. He just kept pulling mounds and mounds of change from his pockets. The teller had a forced smile on her face. The manager strolled over and nodded to indicate that she should continue to put up with it. I found the whole thing amusing. The others did not.
One rather well dressed fellow, clinging to his briefcase, snaps… “This is bullshit… Why the fuck isn’t there an other teller on?”
I smiled, and kind of shrugged my shoulders. He just got angrier.
Briefcase Man: This is making me late for a meeting. This was just a waste of time. Huff (Rolls his eyes)… Fuck…
Me: I don’t mind waiting. I think it’s great that they are willing to give that poor fellow some attention… most people probably ignore him.
Briefcase Man: I don’t care… This just pisses me off…
Then came my turn, so I headed to the teller. She addressed me as Mr. Beaubier. She even pronounced my last name correctly. I love that. It never happens. In all the years that I have done stand up, I have had to correct nearly every MC at least once.
I finish up my business, and I can still hear the Briefcase man bitching from over by the “Special Clients” queue. It seems he got into the wrong line. I bet that burned his fuse just a little shorter.
Me: I hope your meeting goes well…
Briefcase man: Yeah Right… (Muffled voice…) This fucking line…
I open the door and escape out into the sunlight. Next stop, the post office.
It surprised me to find out just exactly how much time I actually spent in queues today. From the bank, to the post office, to Starbucks, to finally where I got my lunch, each one had a line. (For those of you who are interested, I had a BK Veggie Burger, Salad and a medium diet soda. I was amazed at how good the veggie burger was…)
In any case, I’m glad I brought my ipod. Music has always been a good pacifier for me. It keeps me patient. But I’m one of those people that spend so much time sifting through a song. I look for the little hooks in the music. A clever bass line, or a smart key change, and I become a puddle.
On to other stuff…
I had a fun show last night. The crowd was so quiet at the start of the show; I was convinced they were going to hate me. This was not the case at all. Holly told me that I would likely wake them out of their stupor. That was exactly what happened.
They just sat there like lumps for the first 3 acts. Then, as if I had just flipped a switch, they started to perk up and get into the show.
Anyway… enough babble from me…
End of Transmission.
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
06/29/05
Well, It sounds like the rain may have finally abated for a while. It has been a relentless so far this summer. Everything is really soggy. I suspect when it finally does dry up, there will be mosquitoes everywhere. Calgary is going to be West Nile central.
I deliberately left the window in my office open all day, just so I could hear the rain pinging off of the side of the building. It’s a strangely soothing sound to me. PING… Tink, Tink, Tink… PING… I love it. It’s a great sound to fall asleep to. Oddly there hasn’t been much in the way of thunder and lightening. I guess it just hasn’t gotten hot enough.
Tomorrow is supposed to be a little nicer. This city isn’t recovering well from the last downpour. It seems this summer’s rain is making up for the last couple of years of drought with a vengeance. I feel really bad for the people of High River; they just seem to be getting flooded over and over again. (Mind you, with a name like High River, you’d figure it might be a tip off of sorts.)
Things are at least nice and green here. Even the foothills are lush and green. Normally by this time of year, there are grass fire warnings. No dice in 2005.
If this rain keeps up, the Stampede might want to consider using sea horses in the rodeo. They might be the only things able to make it in this weather.
On to other things…
I went home sick today. My stomach was really upset with me. I’m not sure what I did to it, but it gave me heck. I’m feeling a little better now, but still not great. I hate being sick. (Not that I can imagine that there are too many people out there who cherish it…)
I had a nap on the couch when I made it home. The TV was on as I drifted off. I must have rolled onto the remote in my sleep, because when I woke up, it was on the “Home Shopping Network,” which would explain some of the dreams I was having.
I dreamt that people were trying to sell me a Tooth whitening kit, but they themselves had no teeth. They were all gummy and gross. One of the “presenters” looked a lot like Herb Tarlec from WKRP. It was all very odd.
I deliberately left the window in my office open all day, just so I could hear the rain pinging off of the side of the building. It’s a strangely soothing sound to me. PING… Tink, Tink, Tink… PING… I love it. It’s a great sound to fall asleep to. Oddly there hasn’t been much in the way of thunder and lightening. I guess it just hasn’t gotten hot enough.
Tomorrow is supposed to be a little nicer. This city isn’t recovering well from the last downpour. It seems this summer’s rain is making up for the last couple of years of drought with a vengeance. I feel really bad for the people of High River; they just seem to be getting flooded over and over again. (Mind you, with a name like High River, you’d figure it might be a tip off of sorts.)
Things are at least nice and green here. Even the foothills are lush and green. Normally by this time of year, there are grass fire warnings. No dice in 2005.
If this rain keeps up, the Stampede might want to consider using sea horses in the rodeo. They might be the only things able to make it in this weather.
On to other things…
I went home sick today. My stomach was really upset with me. I’m not sure what I did to it, but it gave me heck. I’m feeling a little better now, but still not great. I hate being sick. (Not that I can imagine that there are too many people out there who cherish it…)
I had a nap on the couch when I made it home. The TV was on as I drifted off. I must have rolled onto the remote in my sleep, because when I woke up, it was on the “Home Shopping Network,” which would explain some of the dreams I was having.
I dreamt that people were trying to sell me a Tooth whitening kit, but they themselves had no teeth. They were all gummy and gross. One of the “presenters” looked a lot like Herb Tarlec from WKRP. It was all very odd.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Foo Fighters - In Your Honor
B0009HLDFU.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
Just buy it... It will rock your lame ass...
06/26/05
It’s been a good weekend. I went to see the final performance of Erin’s play on Saturday night. It was really quite good. I’m very proud of her. She seems to have found her stride again in the theatre world. To be fair, she needed to surround herself with the right people. I think she’s done that. It strikes me that the group she’s working with has the same goals and sense of how things should work. It will be neat to see what they do together in the future.
I managed to get some tickets to go and see the Foo Fighters. I’m really excited about that. I suspect that will wind up being one really kick ass show. The band’s leader, Dave Grohl has become a sort of hero to me. Through his efforts and creativity, there is a little hope for real rock and roll after all. He puts the bombast back into music. It’s nice to see someone trying to craft something a little more real. A little message to Nickleback… If you listen to the Foo Fighters, you will know why you are truly awful. Nuff said.
I went to see Batman Begins tonight. I loved it. It was everything a superhero movie should be. My only complaint is that Tom Cruise’s fiancé sucked. Her character was really very flimsy. The introduction of Ra's Al Ghul was really cool. He is one of my most favorite villains. I first read about him in the Jim Aparo days of Detective. Most cool indeed.
It’s nice to report good things. It’s a pleasant change…
I have an idea. I want to write a one-man show. Something that’s different than stand up. I want to try my hand at story telling. Telling people a story about who I am. I’m going to treat it like an experiment. It should be interesting to see where it goes.
I have felt for a little while that there is more than just stand up. Don’t get me wrong here, stand up is my first true love, but I think this will be good for me. I imagine that it could only help stand up in the future. Maybe by doing this, I’ll be able to reach a new level. Stepping away from the comfort of laughter, while scary, has a certain appeal to me.
There is a line that the emperor says in the new Star Wars. The gist is about living a life of greater consequence. Living a life that’s more meaningful, having a life with significance. I think there is a little wisdom in that. I don’t want to exclude things, or dismiss them, but rather employ differing skills to create a better me. It’s not fame or glory I’m after, just the ability to be the best me I can be.
Anyway, It’s just a thought right now, but who knows… there could be something there.
End of Transmission.
I managed to get some tickets to go and see the Foo Fighters. I’m really excited about that. I suspect that will wind up being one really kick ass show. The band’s leader, Dave Grohl has become a sort of hero to me. Through his efforts and creativity, there is a little hope for real rock and roll after all. He puts the bombast back into music. It’s nice to see someone trying to craft something a little more real. A little message to Nickleback… If you listen to the Foo Fighters, you will know why you are truly awful. Nuff said.
I went to see Batman Begins tonight. I loved it. It was everything a superhero movie should be. My only complaint is that Tom Cruise’s fiancé sucked. Her character was really very flimsy. The introduction of Ra's Al Ghul was really cool. He is one of my most favorite villains. I first read about him in the Jim Aparo days of Detective. Most cool indeed.
It’s nice to report good things. It’s a pleasant change…
I have an idea. I want to write a one-man show. Something that’s different than stand up. I want to try my hand at story telling. Telling people a story about who I am. I’m going to treat it like an experiment. It should be interesting to see where it goes.
I have felt for a little while that there is more than just stand up. Don’t get me wrong here, stand up is my first true love, but I think this will be good for me. I imagine that it could only help stand up in the future. Maybe by doing this, I’ll be able to reach a new level. Stepping away from the comfort of laughter, while scary, has a certain appeal to me.
There is a line that the emperor says in the new Star Wars. The gist is about living a life of greater consequence. Living a life that’s more meaningful, having a life with significance. I think there is a little wisdom in that. I don’t want to exclude things, or dismiss them, but rather employ differing skills to create a better me. It’s not fame or glory I’m after, just the ability to be the best me I can be.
Anyway, It’s just a thought right now, but who knows… there could be something there.
End of Transmission.
Sunday, June 26, 2005
This Hole I've Dug is Mine Forever...
thisholeivedugisminefor
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
Another one from
www.explodingdog.com
This one is actually my favorite. I think that I can relate to this drawing for some reason.
The Glass is Half Full
theglassishalffull
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
This was taken from one of my favorite websites of all time.
Check out
www.explodingdog.com
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Lego Bible
You have to check this out. I think it's very funny.
http://www.thebricktestament.com/genesis/
http://www.thebricktestament.com/genesis/
06/25/05 Later edition...
This past week has been pretty good. I’m enjoying the free time. It has given me the chance to take it a lot easier lately. It seems to be paying off, I’m not as tired, and I’m not feeling rushed about anything. Perhaps this will be a good summer. That would be nice.
There hasn’t been much stand up work as of late, and to be honest, I don’t mind that. The summer slows down considerably. (With it being tourist season… not too mention BBQ’s and all the fun summer activities that will be a foot…) It’s kind of nice. However, I’m hoping that the fall will bring more and more work, and ultimately bigger successes both on and off stage.
I’m trying to figure out another trip to Toronto. This time I hope to work more. It would be great to get as many eastern clubs under my belt as possible.
I had a good set on Wednesday. The lessons Dan taught me on the road have helped. I have become more natural on stage, and my personality is drawing itself out nicely. The crowd was good, and eager, just the way I like them. They let me take them where I wanted to go… I didn’t have to work hard for it… It was nice to be able to wander and still have their complete attention. Clubs are much nicer for that level of control, than bar shows… with some exceptions.
The frustrations I used to have on stage seem to have dissipated. I think they were based in clinging too tightly to material, and being afraid to leap away from it. I forgot for a while that I’m naturally funny, and when I remembered that, it just plain got better. I have also gotten away from the need to kill. That just creates pressure, and makes it that much harder to communicate the way I like too. Why create friction when there needs to be none? That’s what this blog is for. Making friction that is…
I have to admit, in terms of this blog; I’ve tripped myself up in a few facts recently. I hate that. I spend so much time chastising others for erroneous information that I feel very much like a hypocrite and a jackass. Well… live and learn I guess. I will endeavour to clarify and verify things better before I haul them out into the open. (Mind you… these have mostly been based on my opinions… and I feel they can be somewhat subjective. I still feel that the National Post is conservative… maybe not in the nature of what party they support, but more in the content that I still disagree with, but then I’m coming from further left of centre than most these days… However, I will still do my best to make sure I’m not just talking outta my ass… insert cheap shot here…)
On to other things…
I have been eating dinner at the Ship and Anchor more often lately. Erin has been super busy with her play, (Which has been going great for her… and its really good too. I’m very proud of her…) and I don’t feel like cooking for just me. So I had to find a decent alternative that wasn’t going to drive me into the poor house.
I have to say; the food there is really good. I have tried most things on the menu, and without a doubt, it’s the best pub food in the city… (If not the best I’ve ever had… Mind you… The Bear and Kilt is quite good too.) If you go there, you should try the Chicken Roll Ups… they’re great. Have the home cut fries too. Mmmm…
Anyway… I have much to do…
End of Transmission.
There hasn’t been much stand up work as of late, and to be honest, I don’t mind that. The summer slows down considerably. (With it being tourist season… not too mention BBQ’s and all the fun summer activities that will be a foot…) It’s kind of nice. However, I’m hoping that the fall will bring more and more work, and ultimately bigger successes both on and off stage.
I’m trying to figure out another trip to Toronto. This time I hope to work more. It would be great to get as many eastern clubs under my belt as possible.
I had a good set on Wednesday. The lessons Dan taught me on the road have helped. I have become more natural on stage, and my personality is drawing itself out nicely. The crowd was good, and eager, just the way I like them. They let me take them where I wanted to go… I didn’t have to work hard for it… It was nice to be able to wander and still have their complete attention. Clubs are much nicer for that level of control, than bar shows… with some exceptions.
The frustrations I used to have on stage seem to have dissipated. I think they were based in clinging too tightly to material, and being afraid to leap away from it. I forgot for a while that I’m naturally funny, and when I remembered that, it just plain got better. I have also gotten away from the need to kill. That just creates pressure, and makes it that much harder to communicate the way I like too. Why create friction when there needs to be none? That’s what this blog is for. Making friction that is…
I have to admit, in terms of this blog; I’ve tripped myself up in a few facts recently. I hate that. I spend so much time chastising others for erroneous information that I feel very much like a hypocrite and a jackass. Well… live and learn I guess. I will endeavour to clarify and verify things better before I haul them out into the open. (Mind you… these have mostly been based on my opinions… and I feel they can be somewhat subjective. I still feel that the National Post is conservative… maybe not in the nature of what party they support, but more in the content that I still disagree with, but then I’m coming from further left of centre than most these days… However, I will still do my best to make sure I’m not just talking outta my ass… insert cheap shot here…)
On to other things…
I have been eating dinner at the Ship and Anchor more often lately. Erin has been super busy with her play, (Which has been going great for her… and its really good too. I’m very proud of her…) and I don’t feel like cooking for just me. So I had to find a decent alternative that wasn’t going to drive me into the poor house.
I have to say; the food there is really good. I have tried most things on the menu, and without a doubt, it’s the best pub food in the city… (If not the best I’ve ever had… Mind you… The Bear and Kilt is quite good too.) If you go there, you should try the Chicken Roll Ups… they’re great. Have the home cut fries too. Mmmm…
Anyway… I have much to do…
End of Transmission.
06/25/05 Duck Season
The Conservatives got caught with their pants down again!!! Martin and his little generals managed to get the NDP budget amendments passed. Sure it was a sneaky move, but there’s no room in Ottawa for the faint of heart. Mr. Harper’s gang seems to be doing nothing but chewing their collective cud.
For an opposition that sees itself as the “Government in Waiting” they sure aren’t very good at sniffing out the best way to beat this government. It’s almost as if they can’t figure out the rules of the game. Or, and I think this is more to the point, they just don’t know how to play.
Now, before any of you dear readers go off the handle, (which I know you will…) you have to admit, the Government house leader managed to quarterback a very smart play. (I know you‘re all going to bitch about how dirty those liberal pigs are… blah blah blah… and I really don’t care. Every time Conservatives get beat… they babble at the mouth about someone running foul… Suck it up… Sour grapes and snarky sulking will get you nothing… Maybe instead, you could find someone who can get the job done. )
In terms of tactics, especially if you look at this like a war, the Liberals are very good. They wrote the playbook. I admire a good thrashing, and that’s exactly what they handed out.
Those poor (dare I say hapless schmo…) Conservatives didn’t even see what hit them. They just sat there, covered in soot, still smoking from the blast. (It kind of reminds me of Daffy Duck, mere moments after blurting the words “DUCK SEASON…”) I can almost hear Carl Stalling warming up the orchestra in the background. “Badee Bahduh Badee… That’s all folks!!!”
Mr. Harper just can’t run with the “big” boys. Imagine going to Ottawa with all that zesty idealism, gleaming with the notion of making some “big changes!!!” and then…wham… absolutely nothing!!! ZIP ZERO… NADA… no progress… Harper has proven time and time again to be impotent. His threats of clobbering Mr. Martin are somewhat reminiscent of a toy poodle named “Tink” trying to take on a pack of wolves.
The truth is this. Mr. Harper probably isn’t that bad a guy. I’m willing to bet he’s a good fellow at heart. I’m sure with friends and family he’s quite a decent sort. I bet he even carves the turkey at Christmas, but he is not a leader of men. In some ways he is very much like Preston Manning. He’s a wonk. He knows policy, and strategy, but he’s not charismatic enough to pull a government out of his hat.
“My boy's gonna play in the Big League
My boy's gonna turn some heads
My boy's gonna play in the Big League
My boy's gonna knock 'em dead
The Big League…”
Well maybe not…
For an opposition that sees itself as the “Government in Waiting” they sure aren’t very good at sniffing out the best way to beat this government. It’s almost as if they can’t figure out the rules of the game. Or, and I think this is more to the point, they just don’t know how to play.
Now, before any of you dear readers go off the handle, (which I know you will…) you have to admit, the Government house leader managed to quarterback a very smart play. (I know you‘re all going to bitch about how dirty those liberal pigs are… blah blah blah… and I really don’t care. Every time Conservatives get beat… they babble at the mouth about someone running foul… Suck it up… Sour grapes and snarky sulking will get you nothing… Maybe instead, you could find someone who can get the job done. )
In terms of tactics, especially if you look at this like a war, the Liberals are very good. They wrote the playbook. I admire a good thrashing, and that’s exactly what they handed out.
Those poor (dare I say hapless schmo…) Conservatives didn’t even see what hit them. They just sat there, covered in soot, still smoking from the blast. (It kind of reminds me of Daffy Duck, mere moments after blurting the words “DUCK SEASON…”) I can almost hear Carl Stalling warming up the orchestra in the background. “Badee Bahduh Badee… That’s all folks!!!”
Mr. Harper just can’t run with the “big” boys. Imagine going to Ottawa with all that zesty idealism, gleaming with the notion of making some “big changes!!!” and then…wham… absolutely nothing!!! ZIP ZERO… NADA… no progress… Harper has proven time and time again to be impotent. His threats of clobbering Mr. Martin are somewhat reminiscent of a toy poodle named “Tink” trying to take on a pack of wolves.
The truth is this. Mr. Harper probably isn’t that bad a guy. I’m willing to bet he’s a good fellow at heart. I’m sure with friends and family he’s quite a decent sort. I bet he even carves the turkey at Christmas, but he is not a leader of men. In some ways he is very much like Preston Manning. He’s a wonk. He knows policy, and strategy, but he’s not charismatic enough to pull a government out of his hat.
“My boy's gonna play in the Big League
My boy's gonna turn some heads
My boy's gonna play in the Big League
My boy's gonna knock 'em dead
The Big League…”
Well maybe not…
Thursday, June 23, 2005
06/23/05 New Tunes
So I thought I'd take a break from the political nonsense currently infesting my blog, to tell you folks about some new discs that I've added to the collection.
So… here it goes…
1) Steel Pulse - The Best of… 20th Century Masters Edition… (For those of you that have never heard of them… well they're great. It's the kind of reggae that would make Bob Marley proud.)
On a side note, the 20th Century masters discs are great.
2) Foo Fighters - In Your Honor (This is my album of the year… Dave Grohl never disappoints. These songs are the hallmark of not only a kick ass rock & roll savior, but a musical craftsman too.
3) Ben Harper - Welcome to the Cruel World. (I'm new on the Harper bandwagon. I've heard his stuff for years, but I never took the time to really give it a listen… I can't believe what I was missing. WOW…)
4) Coldplay - X&Y (Not their best effort, but there are some tracks that I think stand out. Square One, Talk, Speed of Sound and A Message are all really good… the rest of the record is a little heavy on the filler side… Too bad really…)
5) Oasis - Don't Believe the Truth. (Oasis is all grown up. Nuff said…)
So… here it goes…
1) Steel Pulse - The Best of… 20th Century Masters Edition… (For those of you that have never heard of them… well they're great. It's the kind of reggae that would make Bob Marley proud.)
On a side note, the 20th Century masters discs are great.
2) Foo Fighters - In Your Honor (This is my album of the year… Dave Grohl never disappoints. These songs are the hallmark of not only a kick ass rock & roll savior, but a musical craftsman too.
3) Ben Harper - Welcome to the Cruel World. (I'm new on the Harper bandwagon. I've heard his stuff for years, but I never took the time to really give it a listen… I can't believe what I was missing. WOW…)
4) Coldplay - X&Y (Not their best effort, but there are some tracks that I think stand out. Square One, Talk, Speed of Sound and A Message are all really good… the rest of the record is a little heavy on the filler side… Too bad really…)
5) Oasis - Don't Believe the Truth. (Oasis is all grown up. Nuff said…)
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
06/21/05
I’m not sure how it happened… but it appears that my blog has become a bulletin board.
I thought for fun… I’d shed a little light on who the key players are.
Daryl, who is a comic friend of mine, seems to have become my biggest social critic. (At least it would appear that way given the amount of comments he’s left on this blog over that last little while.) I think that’s funny. He and I come from very clearly different ends of the political spectrum, and yet we have a tendency to agree on many other things. We both understand what’s funny, and we both know that Mac trounces PC any day of the week, and I believe that we both like Alexander Keith’s in a tall cold pint glass.
I’ve known him for about 7 years. Daryl was the first emcee ever to bring me to the stage at Yuk Yuks, and he was the first guy I ever went on the road with. We went to a small town called Cremona, which is here in Alberta. (Not to offend the residents of the booming metropolis of Cremona, but it’s hardly a premium gig. At least that’s what I thought at the time.)
You can find out a lot more about Daryl from his blog. The address is www.darylmakk.blogspot.com
Peter is another comic, and one of my best friends. Like me, big Pete is a fellow east coaster. He and I (and our merry band of idiots…) have had many, many adventures. Most of them have left a trail of carnage across the Canadian landscape. Scientists are still trying to figure out how that much damage can be cause by so few people. (I’m sure the poor people of Lethbridge are still reeling… but that’s another story for and from another time.)
Pete’s another member of the cult of Mac. (Die pc die…)
I’ve heard recently that he is taking some big steps to improve his own happiness, and I applaud his strength. Good on you Pete.
Check out his solo adventures… www.peteranthony.blogspot.com
Denise is one of the best protectors a person can have. She welcomed me back to the land of stand up. (Even after I had my little melt down a couple of years ago.) Without her, I would still be bitterly grasping for time at open mikes, and sneering at the mostly miserable crowds.
She is one of my greatest allies, and a good soul too. She helped me find the strength to crawl out of the shit, and stake my claim on the circuit. She is one of my heroes. She went that extra mile when she didn’t have to, and for that I will always be grateful.
Despite the fact that we disagree on hockey teams and political parties, I will always stand and be counted next to her. Her blog is www.dennisrosss.blogspot.com
Daniel Rock, the lone American in the group. (Really he’s more of a Canadian in waiting… or perhaps a currently misplaced Canadian, regardless of what his passport says.) My friendship with him is different. He’s more like a brother to me. He’s a shit disturber too. I think he’s had more practice at it though. I don’t get to see him as often as I’d like to. His opinions are usually founded in a wisdom, which he has in spades. (more than a man of his years should have…) Dan can be found at www.danielrock.blogspot.com
Lisa is a member of my extended family. She’s fiesty. She makes me laugh. I don’t know her as well the others yet, but I’m sure over the years to come I’ll get to know her better. One thing that’s for sure, she has a good sense of humor.
She’s not as premeditated as the others in this little group. I’m not sure of where her convictions come from, but they seem honest at their root. (As does everyone else’s in this group.)
Her blog is new. I’m interested to see where it goes over the next little while. Check her out at
www.crossfieldcowgirl.blogspot.com
Angela is the newest person to this little clique. She is well spoken, and a good lefty. (Hang on to it… there seems to be fewer and fewer of us these days.) I met her in Saskatoon. Dan tormented her while he was on stage, and she still had the fortitude to approach us after the show. She is charming, shy, and has a warm smile. I get the impression she is still trying to find her path. I hope that she finds what she is looking for.
Angela’s home on the web is
www.shyangela.blogspot.com
I thought for fun… I’d shed a little light on who the key players are.
Daryl, who is a comic friend of mine, seems to have become my biggest social critic. (At least it would appear that way given the amount of comments he’s left on this blog over that last little while.) I think that’s funny. He and I come from very clearly different ends of the political spectrum, and yet we have a tendency to agree on many other things. We both understand what’s funny, and we both know that Mac trounces PC any day of the week, and I believe that we both like Alexander Keith’s in a tall cold pint glass.
I’ve known him for about 7 years. Daryl was the first emcee ever to bring me to the stage at Yuk Yuks, and he was the first guy I ever went on the road with. We went to a small town called Cremona, which is here in Alberta. (Not to offend the residents of the booming metropolis of Cremona, but it’s hardly a premium gig. At least that’s what I thought at the time.)
You can find out a lot more about Daryl from his blog. The address is www.darylmakk.blogspot.com
Peter is another comic, and one of my best friends. Like me, big Pete is a fellow east coaster. He and I (and our merry band of idiots…) have had many, many adventures. Most of them have left a trail of carnage across the Canadian landscape. Scientists are still trying to figure out how that much damage can be cause by so few people. (I’m sure the poor people of Lethbridge are still reeling… but that’s another story for and from another time.)
Pete’s another member of the cult of Mac. (Die pc die…)
I’ve heard recently that he is taking some big steps to improve his own happiness, and I applaud his strength. Good on you Pete.
Check out his solo adventures… www.peteranthony.blogspot.com
Denise is one of the best protectors a person can have. She welcomed me back to the land of stand up. (Even after I had my little melt down a couple of years ago.) Without her, I would still be bitterly grasping for time at open mikes, and sneering at the mostly miserable crowds.
She is one of my greatest allies, and a good soul too. She helped me find the strength to crawl out of the shit, and stake my claim on the circuit. She is one of my heroes. She went that extra mile when she didn’t have to, and for that I will always be grateful.
Despite the fact that we disagree on hockey teams and political parties, I will always stand and be counted next to her. Her blog is www.dennisrosss.blogspot.com
Daniel Rock, the lone American in the group. (Really he’s more of a Canadian in waiting… or perhaps a currently misplaced Canadian, regardless of what his passport says.) My friendship with him is different. He’s more like a brother to me. He’s a shit disturber too. I think he’s had more practice at it though. I don’t get to see him as often as I’d like to. His opinions are usually founded in a wisdom, which he has in spades. (more than a man of his years should have…) Dan can be found at www.danielrock.blogspot.com
Lisa is a member of my extended family. She’s fiesty. She makes me laugh. I don’t know her as well the others yet, but I’m sure over the years to come I’ll get to know her better. One thing that’s for sure, she has a good sense of humor.
She’s not as premeditated as the others in this little group. I’m not sure of where her convictions come from, but they seem honest at their root. (As does everyone else’s in this group.)
Her blog is new. I’m interested to see where it goes over the next little while. Check her out at
www.crossfieldcowgirl.blogspot.com
Angela is the newest person to this little clique. She is well spoken, and a good lefty. (Hang on to it… there seems to be fewer and fewer of us these days.) I met her in Saskatoon. Dan tormented her while he was on stage, and she still had the fortitude to approach us after the show. She is charming, shy, and has a warm smile. I get the impression she is still trying to find her path. I hope that she finds what she is looking for.
Angela’s home on the web is
www.shyangela.blogspot.com
Monday, June 20, 2005
06/20/05 Muahahahahahahahaha... Excellent!!!
I’m amazed at the pile of responses I got to the last few posts. Apparently people actually read this thing. You call conservatives hillbillies and they come out of the woodwork. In addition to the comments left on each post, I received numerous emails, both defending and attacking my position. My favourite so far, was an email that said, “Who’s Stephen Harper… is he English?” That one was from someone in North Carolina.
Truthfully, Canadian politics has gotten really interesting for the first time since the whole Meech Lake accord thing happened. Happily, while we all descend into squabbling about whom we should support, we can all take a little solace in knowing that the biggest WMD that we have to worry about is Rick Mercer's ego.
It was nice to see some debate (volatile in some cases…), even if it was artificially instigated. I’m a big fan of inflammatory remarks. They have a tendency to incite people into action. I like that. The biggest problems this country has can be delineated, and perhaps even solved, if we get up off our asses and get something done.
That being said, to all my detractors I have this to say. Personally I think you’re all a bunch of bastards. (I mean that in a loving, I disagree with your opinion, but I respect it… Because you’re my friends kinda way… but bastards none the less.)
And for those of you who agreed with me. Fools… Now that I have you wrapped around my little finger… Fly my pretties fly… Bring me the head of Stephen Harper…
Ahem… That’s it for now…
End of Transmission.
Truthfully, Canadian politics has gotten really interesting for the first time since the whole Meech Lake accord thing happened. Happily, while we all descend into squabbling about whom we should support, we can all take a little solace in knowing that the biggest WMD that we have to worry about is Rick Mercer's ego.
It was nice to see some debate (volatile in some cases…), even if it was artificially instigated. I’m a big fan of inflammatory remarks. They have a tendency to incite people into action. I like that. The biggest problems this country has can be delineated, and perhaps even solved, if we get up off our asses and get something done.
That being said, to all my detractors I have this to say. Personally I think you’re all a bunch of bastards. (I mean that in a loving, I disagree with your opinion, but I respect it… Because you’re my friends kinda way… but bastards none the less.)
And for those of you who agreed with me. Fools… Now that I have you wrapped around my little finger… Fly my pretties fly… Bring me the head of Stephen Harper…
Ahem… That’s it for now…
End of Transmission.
Thursday, June 16, 2005
06/15/05
For the record, I’m a Shithead. (Some of you may have noticed this… And those who know me well will surely confirm this affirmation.) I’m comfortable with that. I have a tendency to wear it like a badge of honour. (Some people get the red badge of courage… But damn it, where’s the fun in that?) I like stirring the pot, and I love pissing people off. It’s fun for me.
The last couple of entries have not disappointed me at all. In fact I’d have to say they have amused me for the last 36 hours (and counting…)
I’ll be honest here, I believe in the things I write (Vehemently in most respects…), but I also tend to tailor the content to derive the maximum entertainment value. The bigger the rise I can get out of someone the better. Sometimes I like to throw a little verbal “wink” in there. Subtext is a beautiful thing. It’s the best tool in the shed.
I love watching people heave their political “guts” up. Especially if the remains look like a recipe that was conceived on a three day bender. For those of you that have seen the movie “Wag the Dog” you know exactly what I mean.
Anyway, having read the comments on the last two posts, I have some things I want to say. I’ve decided to address each comment, so here goes.
1) Denise – A) Stephen Harper isn’t scary. They only way he would be scary is if he really was capable in some fashion. Since he isn’t, he just sort of winds up being impotent. B) There is a difference between disaffected rhetoric and Liberal rhetoric… I am the former and not the later…
2) Angela - I knew I liked you for a reason.
3) Peter - A) Harper’s not a motherfucker. That’s paying to much homage there. B) Positive change has come from liberal thinking. Sadly the liberal party is no longer capable of positive change. That think tank is bankrupt. C) Conservatives have always feared change. That is an axiom. Conservatives in every society on the planet have been responsible for some of the most backward gruesome and callous thinking imaginable. The Nazis were very conservative; the current Bush administration is beyond conservative. They’re zealots… Money-grubbing neo con zealots. Baathists are pretty conservative, and so are the Taliban… (Not too much free thinking here…) K… I’m getting off topic here… (Alright way off topic…) The Conservative party of Canada suffers from the same lack of vision that all Canadian political parties suffer from. It’s three biggest flaws stem from this. 1) They lack any concrete plan to increase productivity in this country. (Which is something that other G8 members have been critical of… and with good reason…) 2) Economic models that they construct do not address anything more than baseline economics. Nothing is designed to encourage homespun business and cottage industry. (Which have been projected to be dominate in this century’s economy.) Agriculture is largely ignored too… (Given the powerbase in the current version of the party that seems really odd to me…) the new economy relies on things that they do not understand. Big business is treasured, but the tools of the new century that will carry Canadians forward have yet to have been understood let alone adopted in any credible fashion. 3) Partisan politics choke the functionality of this country. Instead of voting for the wishes of their constituents, all parties (without exception…) in this country vote “their conscience”. Which has pretty much been code for towing party lines, and is a big load of horseshit. (A recipe for social chaos at the best of times…) The petty nonsense of partisan politics does nothing to help Canada become one of the key players on the world stage in this century. One need only look at the fucked up shit that is happening in the United States to realize this is true.
Truthfully I find it mystifying that anyone could be “only” liberal, or “only” conservative in this day and age. There are too many things at stake to be staunchly one or the other. Given that there are elements of both that are quite distasteful. Imagine what would happen if the abortion laws were repealed. Oops there goes a woman’s right to choose. (Stockwell Day would love that… and he’s a former leader of a party, and still retains a significant amount of power in his party.) Oh hey… looky looky, the death penalty is trendy again. Etc. etc. etc. etc.
4) Denise – A) “Comedians are the purest form of conservatism.” That’s a crock. Comedians are more like libertarians. It’s the quest for liberty that propels us. It’s a more socially pragmatic thing than conservatism. B) There is no such thing as “Liberal Media” it doesn’t exist. That’s a conservative lie. And a big one too. Surely you can’t be that suckered to believe that everything that comes out of the conservative party is gospel. That would be foolhardy. There are liars on all sides of the political spectrum. Liberal media… who would that be exactly? The National post? Not likely… it’s owned by Izzy Asper who is a huge conservative… CTV… owed by Bell… Really fucking conservative… The Globe and Mail? Once again owned by conservatives… The CBC… owned the government… and every previous government before it… liberal and conservative… so like 1 for 4 so far…
5) Daniel – I wanna play hockey… I’ll teach you a proper slap shot the next time you are here.
6) Daryl – You hit the nail on the head about liberty… But your assessment of the media is retarded.
Anyway… it looks like I’ve created a monster here… So I’ll finish my thoughts tomorrow…
The last couple of entries have not disappointed me at all. In fact I’d have to say they have amused me for the last 36 hours (and counting…)
I’ll be honest here, I believe in the things I write (Vehemently in most respects…), but I also tend to tailor the content to derive the maximum entertainment value. The bigger the rise I can get out of someone the better. Sometimes I like to throw a little verbal “wink” in there. Subtext is a beautiful thing. It’s the best tool in the shed.
I love watching people heave their political “guts” up. Especially if the remains look like a recipe that was conceived on a three day bender. For those of you that have seen the movie “Wag the Dog” you know exactly what I mean.
Anyway, having read the comments on the last two posts, I have some things I want to say. I’ve decided to address each comment, so here goes.
1) Denise – A) Stephen Harper isn’t scary. They only way he would be scary is if he really was capable in some fashion. Since he isn’t, he just sort of winds up being impotent. B) There is a difference between disaffected rhetoric and Liberal rhetoric… I am the former and not the later…
2) Angela - I knew I liked you for a reason.
3) Peter - A) Harper’s not a motherfucker. That’s paying to much homage there. B) Positive change has come from liberal thinking. Sadly the liberal party is no longer capable of positive change. That think tank is bankrupt. C) Conservatives have always feared change. That is an axiom. Conservatives in every society on the planet have been responsible for some of the most backward gruesome and callous thinking imaginable. The Nazis were very conservative; the current Bush administration is beyond conservative. They’re zealots… Money-grubbing neo con zealots. Baathists are pretty conservative, and so are the Taliban… (Not too much free thinking here…) K… I’m getting off topic here… (Alright way off topic…) The Conservative party of Canada suffers from the same lack of vision that all Canadian political parties suffer from. It’s three biggest flaws stem from this. 1) They lack any concrete plan to increase productivity in this country. (Which is something that other G8 members have been critical of… and with good reason…) 2) Economic models that they construct do not address anything more than baseline economics. Nothing is designed to encourage homespun business and cottage industry. (Which have been projected to be dominate in this century’s economy.) Agriculture is largely ignored too… (Given the powerbase in the current version of the party that seems really odd to me…) the new economy relies on things that they do not understand. Big business is treasured, but the tools of the new century that will carry Canadians forward have yet to have been understood let alone adopted in any credible fashion. 3) Partisan politics choke the functionality of this country. Instead of voting for the wishes of their constituents, all parties (without exception…) in this country vote “their conscience”. Which has pretty much been code for towing party lines, and is a big load of horseshit. (A recipe for social chaos at the best of times…) The petty nonsense of partisan politics does nothing to help Canada become one of the key players on the world stage in this century. One need only look at the fucked up shit that is happening in the United States to realize this is true.
Truthfully I find it mystifying that anyone could be “only” liberal, or “only” conservative in this day and age. There are too many things at stake to be staunchly one or the other. Given that there are elements of both that are quite distasteful. Imagine what would happen if the abortion laws were repealed. Oops there goes a woman’s right to choose. (Stockwell Day would love that… and he’s a former leader of a party, and still retains a significant amount of power in his party.) Oh hey… looky looky, the death penalty is trendy again. Etc. etc. etc. etc.
4) Denise – A) “Comedians are the purest form of conservatism.” That’s a crock. Comedians are more like libertarians. It’s the quest for liberty that propels us. It’s a more socially pragmatic thing than conservatism. B) There is no such thing as “Liberal Media” it doesn’t exist. That’s a conservative lie. And a big one too. Surely you can’t be that suckered to believe that everything that comes out of the conservative party is gospel. That would be foolhardy. There are liars on all sides of the political spectrum. Liberal media… who would that be exactly? The National post? Not likely… it’s owned by Izzy Asper who is a huge conservative… CTV… owed by Bell… Really fucking conservative… The Globe and Mail? Once again owned by conservatives… The CBC… owned the government… and every previous government before it… liberal and conservative… so like 1 for 4 so far…
5) Daniel – I wanna play hockey… I’ll teach you a proper slap shot the next time you are here.
6) Daryl – You hit the nail on the head about liberty… But your assessment of the media is retarded.
Anyway… it looks like I’ve created a monster here… So I’ll finish my thoughts tomorrow…
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
06/15/05
Well… I knew that last post would stir up some trouble… Let’s see what this does…
Q: What separates a Conservative politician from a hillbilly in this country?
A: A suit of “good clothes” and a seat in parliament… (And perhaps a tape recorder…)
Q: What separates a Conservative politician from a hillbilly in this country?
A: A suit of “good clothes” and a seat in parliament… (And perhaps a tape recorder…)
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
06/14/05 A Rose by Any Other Name...
The Conservatives are now 6 points behind the Liberals in the polls. Hmmm… That’s strange, weren’t they like 11 points ahead just about a month ago? How do you slide 17-points in 30 days? Well done indeed… As far as I can tell, that’s really bad news for all you conservative keeners out there. I’d be starting to worry about your “little” government in waiting right about now. Especially given that they just can’t seem to find that knock out punch. A Raggedy Ann doll should have been able to take down this government. The Liberals even made it easy for you, limping along, and coughing like Tiny freaking Tim (on fire no less…) and still nothing. With the sponsorship scandal attached to the liberals like a suit made out of chum, it looked as if this hungry little shark might finally get his shot. Perhaps a different strategy might be in order.
But I have to say; I think it’s kind of funny that Stephen Harper can’t close the deal. He’s slick and brash, but this horse just can’t seem to make the finish line. When there’s a storm brewing, you need a mudder, not a show horse. It’s hard to get excited every time he comes out of the gate, whinnying, and baying out the tough talk. Here’s why, it’s all rhetoric. Pure fluff. Harper lacks substance. Plain and simple.
Now before you all get angry and send me hate mail… consider this… There is only so much “The Liberals are bad… Because the Liberals are bad…” talk anyone can handle. How much policy have you heard the conservatives talk about? More to the point, policy that is proactive to Canada’s needs, and not reactive to what Canadians wants?
Make no mistake; the liberals are no better at this either. The problem as I see it is this… Canada is really a two party system trying to support five parties. There really isn’t too terribly much different between Conservatives and Liberals anymore. Both parties have had their own share of corruption over the years. (Regardless of how many times the Conservatives tell you they’re “new and improved”… its remarkable how many “old and equally corrupt” faces are still around.)
What will really change the minds of Canadians is charisma. Paul Martin may be a ditherer, but at least he doesn’t come off as a douche bag. Whichever party really wants the country needs to groom a leader. Both parties would do well to find someone with vision.
The brilliant desperation of the past couple of weeks has been pretty darn interesting too. Who tape records conversations anymore? It’s as likely that you’ll win big at three-card monte, as it is this not backfiring in your face. Here’s a handy tip. It helps if you don’t doctor the tapes.
But I have to say; I think it’s kind of funny that Stephen Harper can’t close the deal. He’s slick and brash, but this horse just can’t seem to make the finish line. When there’s a storm brewing, you need a mudder, not a show horse. It’s hard to get excited every time he comes out of the gate, whinnying, and baying out the tough talk. Here’s why, it’s all rhetoric. Pure fluff. Harper lacks substance. Plain and simple.
Now before you all get angry and send me hate mail… consider this… There is only so much “The Liberals are bad… Because the Liberals are bad…” talk anyone can handle. How much policy have you heard the conservatives talk about? More to the point, policy that is proactive to Canada’s needs, and not reactive to what Canadians wants?
Make no mistake; the liberals are no better at this either. The problem as I see it is this… Canada is really a two party system trying to support five parties. There really isn’t too terribly much different between Conservatives and Liberals anymore. Both parties have had their own share of corruption over the years. (Regardless of how many times the Conservatives tell you they’re “new and improved”… its remarkable how many “old and equally corrupt” faces are still around.)
What will really change the minds of Canadians is charisma. Paul Martin may be a ditherer, but at least he doesn’t come off as a douche bag. Whichever party really wants the country needs to groom a leader. Both parties would do well to find someone with vision.
The brilliant desperation of the past couple of weeks has been pretty darn interesting too. Who tape records conversations anymore? It’s as likely that you’ll win big at three-card monte, as it is this not backfiring in your face. Here’s a handy tip. It helps if you don’t doctor the tapes.
Monday, June 13, 2005
06/12/05 Kelowna
Well, I’m back from Kelowna. Overall I would have to say that it was a pretty successful trip. The Thursday show had sold out (They actually had to turn people away…) and by all accounts it went very well. The audience was very attentive, and clearly interested in the show. That was a really nice change from the last couple of times that I’ve played in BC.
The venue has gone through a pretty impressive makeover since the last time I was there. It’s a much nicer place now. (Kind of trendy even… well, almost…) The staff have all turned over since then too. The new people are all very nice. Jennifer, the woman who worked the door was really great. She was the poor victim who got to introduce me to the audience, and she was very nervous about it. (She even said my last name right… on all three shows even…) She did a great job.
My opinion about Kelowna has changed. I really enjoyed this trip.
After the show, I got a chance to see some of the local colour. Kelowna for all its resort beauty has a seedy underbelly. It has an interesting dichotomy comprised of family vacations and greasy bikers.
The Friday show went in a total opposite direction. There were a whopping 12 people at the show. I spent 30 minutes spritzing and chipping away sizable chunks of my self-esteem. (Bigger chunks than I perhaps would have liked.) It felt like an eternity on that stage. But I guess it still beats going on a house boating trip with 59 of my closest friends.
On Saturday things got back to normal. The venue had showed the Tyson fight, and a lot of people stuck around after to see our show. It was a much better attended show than Friday. Truthfully I thought it wound up being the best of all the shows.
The venue has gone through a pretty impressive makeover since the last time I was there. It’s a much nicer place now. (Kind of trendy even… well, almost…) The staff have all turned over since then too. The new people are all very nice. Jennifer, the woman who worked the door was really great. She was the poor victim who got to introduce me to the audience, and she was very nervous about it. (She even said my last name right… on all three shows even…) She did a great job.
My opinion about Kelowna has changed. I really enjoyed this trip.
After the show, I got a chance to see some of the local colour. Kelowna for all its resort beauty has a seedy underbelly. It has an interesting dichotomy comprised of family vacations and greasy bikers.
The Friday show went in a total opposite direction. There were a whopping 12 people at the show. I spent 30 minutes spritzing and chipping away sizable chunks of my self-esteem. (Bigger chunks than I perhaps would have liked.) It felt like an eternity on that stage. But I guess it still beats going on a house boating trip with 59 of my closest friends.
On Saturday things got back to normal. The venue had showed the Tyson fight, and a lot of people stuck around after to see our show. It was a much better attended show than Friday. Truthfully I thought it wound up being the best of all the shows.
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
06/08/05 The Harsh Light of Day
Not even a wink of sleep last night. I just lay in bed, staring at the clock. Each minute seemed like an eternity. I began to feel as if there might be too many minutes in an hour. Tick… Tick… Tick… Blink… Tick… Tick…
This morning my eyelids feel heavy, like they have been fashioned out of cement. They also have that burning sensation that only comes from sleep deprivation. I’m groggy with a few parts clumsy and stupid added for good measure. The coffee doesn’t seem to be helping too much. They should make coffee with speed in it. That would help. Hmm… Speed spiked coffee; I sense a million dollar opportunity. (Sadly this would really only get me back to about half power…)
The walk to work was uneventful. Erin and I meandered to our respective work places in relative quiet. She is just as tired as I am. I’m amazed at how much my personality changes when I’m exhausted.
Tomorrow I go to Kelowna. I’m not sure what to expect. The last time I was there was a year ago. I went with Daryl. The show did not got well. I hope to redeem myself a little. Last time there was only one show. This time three shows. More chances to fix that blemish on the road record. (Or implode brilliantly…)
So far, my day looks like it’s going to be action packed. I have many interviews to get through. We need a lot of new people. I hope that we find some candidates that will fit in with our strange little group.
My worst computing fears have been realized. Apple has pitched IBM chipsets in favour of Intel. Apparently hell has actually frozen over. There is an enemy at the gates, and for some reason, the drawbridge has been left open. No good can come from this. Steve Jobs what have you done?
This morning my eyelids feel heavy, like they have been fashioned out of cement. They also have that burning sensation that only comes from sleep deprivation. I’m groggy with a few parts clumsy and stupid added for good measure. The coffee doesn’t seem to be helping too much. They should make coffee with speed in it. That would help. Hmm… Speed spiked coffee; I sense a million dollar opportunity. (Sadly this would really only get me back to about half power…)
The walk to work was uneventful. Erin and I meandered to our respective work places in relative quiet. She is just as tired as I am. I’m amazed at how much my personality changes when I’m exhausted.
Tomorrow I go to Kelowna. I’m not sure what to expect. The last time I was there was a year ago. I went with Daryl. The show did not got well. I hope to redeem myself a little. Last time there was only one show. This time three shows. More chances to fix that blemish on the road record. (Or implode brilliantly…)
So far, my day looks like it’s going to be action packed. I have many interviews to get through. We need a lot of new people. I hope that we find some candidates that will fit in with our strange little group.
My worst computing fears have been realized. Apple has pitched IBM chipsets in favour of Intel. Apparently hell has actually frozen over. There is an enemy at the gates, and for some reason, the drawbridge has been left open. No good can come from this. Steve Jobs what have you done?
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
06/07/05 Just a silly top ten list...
I got a chain email from a friend the other day. One of the questions was to list my top 10 favorite records. It was a bit of a head scratcher for me at first, but I managed to scrape together a list. So here they are.
1) The Clash – London Calling (my favorite of all time ever…)
2) Sugar – Copper Blue (the best record Bob Mould ever did.)
3) The Talking Heads – Stop Making Sense (The best live record I’ve ever heard…)
4) Radiohead – Ok Computer (This record is self indulgent and every second is delicious.)
5) Dead Kennedys – Plastic Surgery Disasters (“Moon over Marin” and “Terminal Preppie” kick ass)
6) James – Pleased to me you (The best lyrics ever written as far as I’m concerned…)
7) Elvis Costello – My Aim is True (Just as punchy a record today as the day it was recorded…)
8) U2 – Wide Awake in America (the best version of Bad is on this e.p.)
9) Ministry – The Mind is a Terrible Thing to Taste. (This tasty dish is best served at the loudest volume possible.)
10) Bob Marley – Exodus (The man was a prophet… nuff said…)
I felt there were some honorable mentions that needed to be recognized…
1) Doughboys – Whatever
2) Miles Davis – Kinda Blue
3) Public Enemy – Fear of a Black Planet
4) Fugazi – Repeater
5) Down By Law – Punkrockacademyfightsong
6) Pearl Jam – Riot Act
1) The Clash – London Calling (my favorite of all time ever…)
2) Sugar – Copper Blue (the best record Bob Mould ever did.)
3) The Talking Heads – Stop Making Sense (The best live record I’ve ever heard…)
4) Radiohead – Ok Computer (This record is self indulgent and every second is delicious.)
5) Dead Kennedys – Plastic Surgery Disasters (“Moon over Marin” and “Terminal Preppie” kick ass)
6) James – Pleased to me you (The best lyrics ever written as far as I’m concerned…)
7) Elvis Costello – My Aim is True (Just as punchy a record today as the day it was recorded…)
8) U2 – Wide Awake in America (the best version of Bad is on this e.p.)
9) Ministry – The Mind is a Terrible Thing to Taste. (This tasty dish is best served at the loudest volume possible.)
10) Bob Marley – Exodus (The man was a prophet… nuff said…)
I felt there were some honorable mentions that needed to be recognized…
1) Doughboys – Whatever
2) Miles Davis – Kinda Blue
3) Public Enemy – Fear of a Black Planet
4) Fugazi – Repeater
5) Down By Law – Punkrockacademyfightsong
6) Pearl Jam – Riot Act
06/07/05 Rainy days and Religious Super Heros...
Today has been a good day. Work was relaxed; there were no panicked situations waiting to explode, or any moments of unfettered mania. The day just moved along with it’s own lazy pace. Its flow has been more natural, dare I say peaceful even.
It has rained here for 7 days straight. It really reminds me of home. Apparently there has been a rush on for umbrellas and the city’s retailers have been caught flat-footed by it. It’s so rare for Calgary to get this much moisture at one time. It feels more like Atlantic Canada, and much less like Alberta these days. I found myself dancing a little on my way to work. Twirling my umbrella, and singing along to Madeline Peyroux’s “Don’t Wait too long.” It was like something out of a cheesy musical, yet it was mentally refreshing at the same time.
I actually enjoy walking in the rain. I love the smell in the air after it rains. For me it’s the scent of renewal. Every time I draw air into my lungs, it feels like everything around me is a little less grimy, and just a little livelier. Perhaps that’s a strange notion, but I really don’t care.
Only once that I can recall, have I found rain eerie. It was a few years ago. I was on my way to the Ship and Anchor with a good friend of mine, and we wound up parking on a side street that was a couple of blocks away. In most respects, it was a rather typical apartment building type of neighbourhood. There were six story buildings on both sides of the street, with mature trees lining the sidewalks.
It was about midnight, and it had been raining quite hard. The streets were shiny and had the look of a fun house mirror, brilliantly reflecting the streetlights upward. It almost looked as if there were lights in the asphalt.
At the end of the street there was a church. Now, I’m not too sure what flavour of Christian faith it was, but it had a blazing red cross in its steeple. The cross was reflecting its image onto the pavement too. It was distorted and sprawled up the street. It looked to be about twenty feet tall, and roughly ten feet wide. It appeared fuzzy, and had a bent look to it, like when you peer at a partially submerged object and it seems all-askew.
It was kind of creepy. It was a little oppressive seeing this giant blazing cross. It gave me a shudder at first, buy then it started to remind me of the Bat signal. I half expected to see a priest in his vestments and an altar boy run out of the church and jump into a hearse and speed away. (insert theme music here…)
Anyway… More in a bit.
It has rained here for 7 days straight. It really reminds me of home. Apparently there has been a rush on for umbrellas and the city’s retailers have been caught flat-footed by it. It’s so rare for Calgary to get this much moisture at one time. It feels more like Atlantic Canada, and much less like Alberta these days. I found myself dancing a little on my way to work. Twirling my umbrella, and singing along to Madeline Peyroux’s “Don’t Wait too long.” It was like something out of a cheesy musical, yet it was mentally refreshing at the same time.
I actually enjoy walking in the rain. I love the smell in the air after it rains. For me it’s the scent of renewal. Every time I draw air into my lungs, it feels like everything around me is a little less grimy, and just a little livelier. Perhaps that’s a strange notion, but I really don’t care.
Only once that I can recall, have I found rain eerie. It was a few years ago. I was on my way to the Ship and Anchor with a good friend of mine, and we wound up parking on a side street that was a couple of blocks away. In most respects, it was a rather typical apartment building type of neighbourhood. There were six story buildings on both sides of the street, with mature trees lining the sidewalks.
It was about midnight, and it had been raining quite hard. The streets were shiny and had the look of a fun house mirror, brilliantly reflecting the streetlights upward. It almost looked as if there were lights in the asphalt.
At the end of the street there was a church. Now, I’m not too sure what flavour of Christian faith it was, but it had a blazing red cross in its steeple. The cross was reflecting its image onto the pavement too. It was distorted and sprawled up the street. It looked to be about twenty feet tall, and roughly ten feet wide. It appeared fuzzy, and had a bent look to it, like when you peer at a partially submerged object and it seems all-askew.
It was kind of creepy. It was a little oppressive seeing this giant blazing cross. It gave me a shudder at first, buy then it started to remind me of the Bat signal. I half expected to see a priest in his vestments and an altar boy run out of the church and jump into a hearse and speed away. (insert theme music here…)
Anyway… More in a bit.
06/06/05 Blog Holiday
This post is just to catch up on a lot of shit that I’ve let slide lately.
As some of you more dedicated readers may have noticed, till now, I have taken a bit of a blog holiday. I needed to spend some time on me. The time I normally dedicate to this thing has been taken up lately by trying to spend time with Erin (esp. now that we both are up to our eyes…) evening strolls, video games, good music, and other such sundre things.
In addition, I haven’t really had too terribly much to say. It’s been a bit of a blessing to just exist for a spell. I feel no need to fly off the handle with a rant. (Mind you, there will likely be one in the near (ish) future… I can’t go too long before something picks my ass to the point of madness…) I don’t wish to scrap it out with the powers that be; I’m just enjoying living. The only things missing are a rocky beach, a cloudy day, and some stones to skip off the ocean. Now that would kick some serious ass.
I’m in a good headspace right now, which pleases me. Sadly though, it never lasts for too long, but I intend to enjoy it while it wraps around me like a warm blanket.
Next…
My constant battle to trim down is going reasonably well, (24 pounds and counting…) although, I duked it out with a Hawaiian Pizza the other night, and it won. Defeated by pizza, and not even one that I particularly like either. I am a foolish mortal indeed. I have a hard time understanding why someone came up with the concept of Hawaiian Pizza. Pizza should have pepperoni on it. It should be a law. There should be some sort of Pizza police to enforce it too…
“Freeze… Pizza police… Step away from the Pineapple… I SAID Drop that pineapple Mother fucker… Blam… Blam…”
Next…
I’m on the hunt for some new friends. Don’t get me wrong; I have a bunch already, but none of the really close ones live here. (At least not currently…) Daniel is back in America. Brett and Pete are in Toronto. Russ is in Northern BC and Emmo is on the rock.
Those distances suck. I miss my brothers. Each one of them is brilliant, and too far away for my liking.
So in what so far appears to be a vain attempt to fill the void left by their absence, I’ve decided to hold auditions for the rolls of “Knock Around Chum” and “Co –conspirator”, but thus far, very few have made the callback process… If you think you’ve got what it takes, send me an email…
Next…
I tried the new Tantric sex joke at Yuks the other night. It worked. I was pleased.
Anyway… I should sleep…
But for those of you dear readers who were wondering…
I’m Back…
And for those of you wishing to audition...
mbeaubier@msn.com
good luck!
As some of you more dedicated readers may have noticed, till now, I have taken a bit of a blog holiday. I needed to spend some time on me. The time I normally dedicate to this thing has been taken up lately by trying to spend time with Erin (esp. now that we both are up to our eyes…) evening strolls, video games, good music, and other such sundre things.
In addition, I haven’t really had too terribly much to say. It’s been a bit of a blessing to just exist for a spell. I feel no need to fly off the handle with a rant. (Mind you, there will likely be one in the near (ish) future… I can’t go too long before something picks my ass to the point of madness…) I don’t wish to scrap it out with the powers that be; I’m just enjoying living. The only things missing are a rocky beach, a cloudy day, and some stones to skip off the ocean. Now that would kick some serious ass.
I’m in a good headspace right now, which pleases me. Sadly though, it never lasts for too long, but I intend to enjoy it while it wraps around me like a warm blanket.
Next…
My constant battle to trim down is going reasonably well, (24 pounds and counting…) although, I duked it out with a Hawaiian Pizza the other night, and it won. Defeated by pizza, and not even one that I particularly like either. I am a foolish mortal indeed. I have a hard time understanding why someone came up with the concept of Hawaiian Pizza. Pizza should have pepperoni on it. It should be a law. There should be some sort of Pizza police to enforce it too…
“Freeze… Pizza police… Step away from the Pineapple… I SAID Drop that pineapple Mother fucker… Blam… Blam…”
Next…
I’m on the hunt for some new friends. Don’t get me wrong; I have a bunch already, but none of the really close ones live here. (At least not currently…) Daniel is back in America. Brett and Pete are in Toronto. Russ is in Northern BC and Emmo is on the rock.
Those distances suck. I miss my brothers. Each one of them is brilliant, and too far away for my liking.
So in what so far appears to be a vain attempt to fill the void left by their absence, I’ve decided to hold auditions for the rolls of “Knock Around Chum” and “Co –conspirator”, but thus far, very few have made the callback process… If you think you’ve got what it takes, send me an email…
Next…
I tried the new Tantric sex joke at Yuks the other night. It worked. I was pleased.
Anyway… I should sleep…
But for those of you dear readers who were wondering…
I’m Back…
And for those of you wishing to audition...
mbeaubier@msn.com
good luck!
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
05/30/05
“One baby to another says - I'm lucky to have met you
I don't care what you think, unless it is about me
It is now my duty to completely drain you…”
I’ve had this Nirvana song stuck in my head for 3 weeks straight. It’s called “Drain You” I’m sure it must mean something. (For the record, I love the song… but it seems to be haunting me.)
I did a lot of walking today. I walked to and from work, and then a bunch (the closest empirical measurement I could muster…) more tonight. It was nice and sunny today. The trees in my neigbourhood have finally surrendered their buds, and the shade along 13th avenue is lovely. I found myself stomping along, and blasting Bad Religion as loudly as the little ipod could muster. I had a good groove going on.
I got to wear my Punk Voter t-shirt today. That makes me happy. It’s the first time I’ve ever been able to wear it. When I got it in November, It was really, really tight. Now it’s billowing off of me. It’s red and had a picture of Bush on it with evil written across his forehead. There are some things that I am willing to advertise, and my brand of politics is one of them.
I’ve been kinda bored lately. After that spate of gigs, it got quiet. Too damn quiet. I really need some stage time. The time off is not fun. No gang, I don’t like it.
When I went for my walk tonight, I stopped at the Ship for a diet coke. Three separate people approached me, to tell me that they recognized me from appearances at Yuks. It was really strange. It was flattering, but a little uncomfortable too. I guess its cause I never go up to a dentist or some other professional and say… “Nice job with that crown…” or “Way to prosecute that criminal…”
Don’t get me wrong. I think it’s cool to get some validation for what I do, and I guess there’s a cult of personality thing there too, but it just makes me feel awkward.
You can always tell when someone recognizes you too. They all make the same kind of gesticulation. First there’s the cup of the hand over the mouth, while they whisper to whomever they are with, then the lingering stare, finally followed by the approach. It’s kinda funny actually. That pattern never changes.
Anyway it’s time to sleep.
I don't care what you think, unless it is about me
It is now my duty to completely drain you…”
I’ve had this Nirvana song stuck in my head for 3 weeks straight. It’s called “Drain You” I’m sure it must mean something. (For the record, I love the song… but it seems to be haunting me.)
I did a lot of walking today. I walked to and from work, and then a bunch (the closest empirical measurement I could muster…) more tonight. It was nice and sunny today. The trees in my neigbourhood have finally surrendered their buds, and the shade along 13th avenue is lovely. I found myself stomping along, and blasting Bad Religion as loudly as the little ipod could muster. I had a good groove going on.
I got to wear my Punk Voter t-shirt today. That makes me happy. It’s the first time I’ve ever been able to wear it. When I got it in November, It was really, really tight. Now it’s billowing off of me. It’s red and had a picture of Bush on it with evil written across his forehead. There are some things that I am willing to advertise, and my brand of politics is one of them.
I’ve been kinda bored lately. After that spate of gigs, it got quiet. Too damn quiet. I really need some stage time. The time off is not fun. No gang, I don’t like it.
When I went for my walk tonight, I stopped at the Ship for a diet coke. Three separate people approached me, to tell me that they recognized me from appearances at Yuks. It was really strange. It was flattering, but a little uncomfortable too. I guess its cause I never go up to a dentist or some other professional and say… “Nice job with that crown…” or “Way to prosecute that criminal…”
Don’t get me wrong. I think it’s cool to get some validation for what I do, and I guess there’s a cult of personality thing there too, but it just makes me feel awkward.
You can always tell when someone recognizes you too. They all make the same kind of gesticulation. First there’s the cup of the hand over the mouth, while they whisper to whomever they are with, then the lingering stare, finally followed by the approach. It’s kinda funny actually. That pattern never changes.
Anyway it’s time to sleep.
Friday, May 27, 2005
05/26/05 Today...
I slept late today. I have been exhausted lately. It’s the kind of tired that makes you feel brittle. It’s almost as if you might break in a gust of wind. It’s my own fault though. I have little to no compunction to sleep until I shut down. This is nothing new to me. Those who read this blog, or who know me well, know I don’t shut down. I crash.
I looked in the mirror when I got up. My eyes were bloodshot. I have never seen them that bloodshot before. I looked like I might have gone though a very hard night of drinking.
Alas that was not the case. At least that way I could blame it on something other that my dysfunctional circadian rhythm. They looked like little pink marbles. They felt heavy like glass too. In my sleep-deprived state, I imagine kids playing knock outs with them. I know this can’t be good.
Work was as work is. I got myself the obligatory caffeine injection, and got rolling along. We started a one off project that just didn’t seem to get off the ground very well. It was slow and ugly. My gang had gotten quite frustrated with it, and I don’t blame them. It was a rough go.
I got home later than I had planned on. It took forever to get finished tonight. Erin was up, but not for long. She conked out early, so I decided to go for a walk.
The night air was nice. Not warm, but not chilly either, it was what I decided to be the perfect walking weather. I made it to the Ship and Anchor. The patio was full, and music spilled out onto the street, like it was rushing to meet me. I popped in to see who was around. About twenty minutes later, I decided to make my way for home again.
That takes me to here. It’s late again, and yet I sit and type this. A damn fool I am.
I looked in the mirror when I got up. My eyes were bloodshot. I have never seen them that bloodshot before. I looked like I might have gone though a very hard night of drinking.
Alas that was not the case. At least that way I could blame it on something other that my dysfunctional circadian rhythm. They looked like little pink marbles. They felt heavy like glass too. In my sleep-deprived state, I imagine kids playing knock outs with them. I know this can’t be good.
Work was as work is. I got myself the obligatory caffeine injection, and got rolling along. We started a one off project that just didn’t seem to get off the ground very well. It was slow and ugly. My gang had gotten quite frustrated with it, and I don’t blame them. It was a rough go.
I got home later than I had planned on. It took forever to get finished tonight. Erin was up, but not for long. She conked out early, so I decided to go for a walk.
The night air was nice. Not warm, but not chilly either, it was what I decided to be the perfect walking weather. I made it to the Ship and Anchor. The patio was full, and music spilled out onto the street, like it was rushing to meet me. I popped in to see who was around. About twenty minutes later, I decided to make my way for home again.
That takes me to here. It’s late again, and yet I sit and type this. A damn fool I am.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
05/24/05 cont'd
7am. Not my most favourite time of day. I don’t understand how my wife does this everyday. What kind of cruel taskmaster decided that this was the perfect time of day for people to be productive? There should be a revolution. Utopia for me would be starting work at noon. That sounds much more reasonable. Some may think that this notion is outta step. I say it’s sane.
The walk to work was nice enough. It was surprisingly quiet. There was no line at the café. (A rare occurrence…) Those poor bastards have to be up even earlier.
I think our society would be a much better place if we started our days much later. Imagine tens of millions of people who are well-rested, and ready to start the day fresh. There would be no need for guns; wars would be a thing of the past, as would road rage. The lack of sleep that triggers human stupidity would no longer exist. Productivity would be high; sales of sleeping aids would be low.
On to other things…
I’m working on a joke about Sting. The joke, more specifically is about his thoughts on tantric sex. I won’t get into the details of the joke, but I started thinking about what else could have tantric used as a suffix. Here’s a list.
1)Tantric Violence (This is a concept who’s time has come…)
2)Tantric Ambivalence (I’d write something here, but… aw fuck it…)
3)Tantric Obesity (Pass the dutchie…)
4)Tantric Misery (Sadly this one works for far to many people I know…)
5)Tantric Tragedy (Everyone knows someone who embraces this as their own personal mantra.)
I’m positive I’ll come up with more…
End of Transmission
The walk to work was nice enough. It was surprisingly quiet. There was no line at the café. (A rare occurrence…) Those poor bastards have to be up even earlier.
I think our society would be a much better place if we started our days much later. Imagine tens of millions of people who are well-rested, and ready to start the day fresh. There would be no need for guns; wars would be a thing of the past, as would road rage. The lack of sleep that triggers human stupidity would no longer exist. Productivity would be high; sales of sleeping aids would be low.
On to other things…
I’m working on a joke about Sting. The joke, more specifically is about his thoughts on tantric sex. I won’t get into the details of the joke, but I started thinking about what else could have tantric used as a suffix. Here’s a list.
1)Tantric Violence (This is a concept who’s time has come…)
2)Tantric Ambivalence (I’d write something here, but… aw fuck it…)
3)Tantric Obesity (Pass the dutchie…)
4)Tantric Misery (Sadly this one works for far to many people I know…)
5)Tantric Tragedy (Everyone knows someone who embraces this as their own personal mantra.)
I’m positive I’ll come up with more…
End of Transmission
05/24/05
Yet another entry in “The I can’t sleep chronicles.”
It’s been a fun couple of weeks. Life is generally pretty good. Erin and I had a good celebration this weekend. One year and counting, so far so good.
I’ve gone the movies a lot over the past week. On Wednesday Daniel and I went to see the new Star Wars flick. I loved it. It is my belief that for the duration of that film, time had no meaning. For just about 3 hours, I was that same awestruck little boy sitting in the theater in 1977. It was brilliant. All in all, it was a delicious moment of self-indulgence.
I had so much fun, that I had to go again. Erin and I went with her folks. It had that same magic for me once again. I think in some ways, I may have an unhealthy love of all things Star Wars. But then again, without Star Wars, it’s unlikely that I would love movies as much as I do. It has become the praxis of my love of cinema.
It was fun to see all the geeks out in full force. There were costumes spanning the entire gamut of the Star Wars universe. It was definitely more than a film. It was an event. A moment when geeks everywhere knew it would be okay to come out and play, and they didn’t disappoint.
Last night, Erin and I went to see Kingdom of Heaven. I must say I liked it too. It evoked the same sense of adventure that “Gladiator” did. It was a little slower in spots, but there was enough solid material there to keep my interest keen.
More later.
It’s been a fun couple of weeks. Life is generally pretty good. Erin and I had a good celebration this weekend. One year and counting, so far so good.
I’ve gone the movies a lot over the past week. On Wednesday Daniel and I went to see the new Star Wars flick. I loved it. It is my belief that for the duration of that film, time had no meaning. For just about 3 hours, I was that same awestruck little boy sitting in the theater in 1977. It was brilliant. All in all, it was a delicious moment of self-indulgence.
I had so much fun, that I had to go again. Erin and I went with her folks. It had that same magic for me once again. I think in some ways, I may have an unhealthy love of all things Star Wars. But then again, without Star Wars, it’s unlikely that I would love movies as much as I do. It has become the praxis of my love of cinema.
It was fun to see all the geeks out in full force. There were costumes spanning the entire gamut of the Star Wars universe. It was definitely more than a film. It was an event. A moment when geeks everywhere knew it would be okay to come out and play, and they didn’t disappoint.
Last night, Erin and I went to see Kingdom of Heaven. I must say I liked it too. It evoked the same sense of adventure that “Gladiator” did. It was a little slower in spots, but there was enough solid material there to keep my interest keen.
More later.
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
05/17/05 Raining on Grandpa's garden
It’s 2:37 am; I can hear the rain ricocheting off the balcony. I love the rain. It reminds me of home. Newfoundland gets a lot of rain. It can be a little overwhelming sometimes, especially if it rains for weeks on end, but I miss it. I think I must have begun to count on it, as if it were the metronome that kept my life in time. It’s a strange comfort for me, likely because we just don’t get that much of it here in Calgary.
It’s been raining for a couple of hours now. It’s a good thing too; it’s been really dusty lately. The last few days have had a bit of grit to them, hopefully the water can wash it all away.
I fit into a pair of shorts that haven’t fit me properly for 2 years. That makes me happy. I’ve been doing well and the rewards are starting to make themselves known. My target is still about 30 pounds away. It seems like a mountain to climb, but at least I’m at the first base camp.
I went for a walk today. The smell of lilacs greeted me as I marched down 17th avenue. The fragrance reminds me of being at my grandparents’ house in the summer. There were always brilliant flowers in their backyard. My Grandfather was an amazing gardener. It was in his blood. He was a farmer first, and then when he retired, he moved to Calgary and got a job growing roses for a local greenhouse. It made him happy. He loved to putter around in the yard; I think it kept him going.
He always had the sweetest carrots in the yard. You could just pull them out of the dirt, give them a little squirt from the hose, and voila. They were almost like candy.
I miss him very much. He was just about the best person I have ever known. He was a kind and gentle soul, and he had this impish twinkle in his eye.
When I was in college, he did his best to make sure I never went without. Every time I left their house, usually after grandma (who was equally saintly…) had laid out a feast, I’d find a crisp 50-dollar bill in my pocket. I tried giving it back a few times, but never with much luck. He would pretend he had no idea where it came from, and then he’d just wink at me.
He always had the best advice. Sometimes it was masked as a story from his youth, but it always made sense. (Not always right away mind you… Sometimes it would go off like a little time bomb in my head as I headed home…) He helped me through a lot of heart ache, and was really patient with me, especially when I was less than patient with myself.
He’s been gone for about 6 years now. I was with him when he died. It was New Years day 1999. I had just gotten back from Saskatoon and had barely made it to see him. I managed to say goodbye. I’m not sure I ever got over hid death.
He was my moral compass. He was the measuring stick I used to pick my friends with. I heard somewhere that everyone you meet leaves a mark on your soul. I believe that to be true. I suspect that he left more than a mark. Most of the time it feels more like a riverbed.
Sometimes I still see him, usually in the strangest places. Once in a while I’m convinced I see him at the Edo Japan in the food court at the mall. It was his favorite.
I’m not sure why I decided to write about him tonight. Perhaps I’ve been thinking about the road too much. The distances are long, and there are a lot of farms along the way. I guess they just remind me of him.
Anyway I miss him.
It’s been raining for a couple of hours now. It’s a good thing too; it’s been really dusty lately. The last few days have had a bit of grit to them, hopefully the water can wash it all away.
I fit into a pair of shorts that haven’t fit me properly for 2 years. That makes me happy. I’ve been doing well and the rewards are starting to make themselves known. My target is still about 30 pounds away. It seems like a mountain to climb, but at least I’m at the first base camp.
I went for a walk today. The smell of lilacs greeted me as I marched down 17th avenue. The fragrance reminds me of being at my grandparents’ house in the summer. There were always brilliant flowers in their backyard. My Grandfather was an amazing gardener. It was in his blood. He was a farmer first, and then when he retired, he moved to Calgary and got a job growing roses for a local greenhouse. It made him happy. He loved to putter around in the yard; I think it kept him going.
He always had the sweetest carrots in the yard. You could just pull them out of the dirt, give them a little squirt from the hose, and voila. They were almost like candy.
I miss him very much. He was just about the best person I have ever known. He was a kind and gentle soul, and he had this impish twinkle in his eye.
When I was in college, he did his best to make sure I never went without. Every time I left their house, usually after grandma (who was equally saintly…) had laid out a feast, I’d find a crisp 50-dollar bill in my pocket. I tried giving it back a few times, but never with much luck. He would pretend he had no idea where it came from, and then he’d just wink at me.
He always had the best advice. Sometimes it was masked as a story from his youth, but it always made sense. (Not always right away mind you… Sometimes it would go off like a little time bomb in my head as I headed home…) He helped me through a lot of heart ache, and was really patient with me, especially when I was less than patient with myself.
He’s been gone for about 6 years now. I was with him when he died. It was New Years day 1999. I had just gotten back from Saskatoon and had barely made it to see him. I managed to say goodbye. I’m not sure I ever got over hid death.
He was my moral compass. He was the measuring stick I used to pick my friends with. I heard somewhere that everyone you meet leaves a mark on your soul. I believe that to be true. I suspect that he left more than a mark. Most of the time it feels more like a riverbed.
Sometimes I still see him, usually in the strangest places. Once in a while I’m convinced I see him at the Edo Japan in the food court at the mall. It was his favorite.
I’m not sure why I decided to write about him tonight. Perhaps I’ve been thinking about the road too much. The distances are long, and there are a lot of farms along the way. I guess they just remind me of him.
Anyway I miss him.
Thursday, May 12, 2005
05/12/05 Home Sweet Home
I’m home for a while. I’m happy to be here too. Happily I don’t have another road gig till the second week of June. I feel like I’ve been living in a suitcase for most of the New Year. I’m not complaining about it, but there is definitely something to be said for home. I think I took the creature comforts for granted. Nothing makes me happier than my own bed, and the one I love sleeping next to me.
Other stuff...
It seems the stage time has done me some good though, I feel stronger and more capable than I did, and have started writing again. It’s still dirty, but I have decided to embrace that for what it is. This is the place where I am right now, and this material has it’s own value. I’m sure that it will evolve as everything does, but for now it’s as good as it gets.
This concept of being a rostered professional comic is cool. The comics I had idolized as an amateur have become contemporaries. It’s a good feeling. I have started my journey into the real business of Stand Up, and damn it, I like it.
There are some things that I don’t like about this business. It’s rampant with politics, and it’s very difficult to stay away from it. The fragility of most comics’ egos doesn’t help the matter either. It’s like adding white gas to an already raging fire. There are too many little squabbles between what should be grown adults. Sometimes they boil over, and sometimes they just sit and simmer for years, either way no one wins. Almost always others get caught in the middle of the feud de jour, and with remarkable certainty they get hurt.
Other stuff...
It seems the stage time has done me some good though, I feel stronger and more capable than I did, and have started writing again. It’s still dirty, but I have decided to embrace that for what it is. This is the place where I am right now, and this material has it’s own value. I’m sure that it will evolve as everything does, but for now it’s as good as it gets.
This concept of being a rostered professional comic is cool. The comics I had idolized as an amateur have become contemporaries. It’s a good feeling. I have started my journey into the real business of Stand Up, and damn it, I like it.
There are some things that I don’t like about this business. It’s rampant with politics, and it’s very difficult to stay away from it. The fragility of most comics’ egos doesn’t help the matter either. It’s like adding white gas to an already raging fire. There are too many little squabbles between what should be grown adults. Sometimes they boil over, and sometimes they just sit and simmer for years, either way no one wins. Almost always others get caught in the middle of the feud de jour, and with remarkable certainty they get hurt.
Monday, May 09, 2005
05/09/05
The trip to Saskatchewan was fun. After being friends with Daniel for more than 5 years, we finally managed to hit the road together. (Yuks finally relented… or more to the point, we were both out of the shit books at the same time…. Kudos to Holly for putting this together…)
Dan is a curious, and kinda impish fellow. He uses charm to his advantage, and has a keen sense of his own abilities. He is definitely a comedy warrior, but it's obvious that the road has clearly left its mark on him. He drags on his personality with impunity, and lets it drive his show. His character leaves a frank and distinct impression, but its force of will that makes him funny. (Very funny indeed…)
His freewheeling style makes his show natural, and very easy going. Its pace is dictated by his whim. (One might even say it tends to be rather breezy…) But at no point is he compromising. When he decides to exert more control over an audience, they become better for it. He's a treat to watch.
Saskatoon was a very good show. I did well. There were a couple of soft jokes, but overall it was solid. I like it there. The people in Saskatoon are very nice, open sort of folk. Everyone I talked with had a warmth, and a little light in their eyes. It was a very positive experience.
I ran into a former employee of mine working at the hotel we were staying at. It was very strange to see him. (Given that the set of circumstances that led to his being "freed up for new opportunities" were quite strange in and amongst themselves…) He seemed happy, and looked healthier than I can ever recall seeing him.
After the show, which went rather well, we mingled with the crowd for a bit, and then went off to have a drink. Dan managed to strike up a conversation that met his fancy and I went off in search of some live music with a few of the locals.
I saw an average cover band, and had a couple of drinks, and met some nice people.
Overall it was a good day.
Regina, was not as good, but still went well. We were warned in advance that the crowd was going to be small (which helped…) and the show had a different feel to it. It was a slower pace, and the crowd reactions, while positive, were smaller.
The majority of the audience was made up of RCMP cadets. (Apparently I seem to attract them… Like last year in William's lake…) Happily they were pretty young, and still liked to party.
It wasn't a wild night. I was asleep by about 1:15 or so, but I had some odd dreams that I'm still trying to figure out.
The strangest thing about the trip was this. In Saskatchewan retailers have to hide cigarettes behind a curtain. The rationale employed here is that by hiding them, they can't be a lure for children. I think that's brilliantly stupid. Once again smokers are being treated like social pariahs. It felt like I was trying to buy porn. Soon you'll have to get them wrapped in brown paper.
Dan is a curious, and kinda impish fellow. He uses charm to his advantage, and has a keen sense of his own abilities. He is definitely a comedy warrior, but it's obvious that the road has clearly left its mark on him. He drags on his personality with impunity, and lets it drive his show. His character leaves a frank and distinct impression, but its force of will that makes him funny. (Very funny indeed…)
His freewheeling style makes his show natural, and very easy going. Its pace is dictated by his whim. (One might even say it tends to be rather breezy…) But at no point is he compromising. When he decides to exert more control over an audience, they become better for it. He's a treat to watch.
Saskatoon was a very good show. I did well. There were a couple of soft jokes, but overall it was solid. I like it there. The people in Saskatoon are very nice, open sort of folk. Everyone I talked with had a warmth, and a little light in their eyes. It was a very positive experience.
I ran into a former employee of mine working at the hotel we were staying at. It was very strange to see him. (Given that the set of circumstances that led to his being "freed up for new opportunities" were quite strange in and amongst themselves…) He seemed happy, and looked healthier than I can ever recall seeing him.
After the show, which went rather well, we mingled with the crowd for a bit, and then went off to have a drink. Dan managed to strike up a conversation that met his fancy and I went off in search of some live music with a few of the locals.
I saw an average cover band, and had a couple of drinks, and met some nice people.
Overall it was a good day.
Regina, was not as good, but still went well. We were warned in advance that the crowd was going to be small (which helped…) and the show had a different feel to it. It was a slower pace, and the crowd reactions, while positive, were smaller.
The majority of the audience was made up of RCMP cadets. (Apparently I seem to attract them… Like last year in William's lake…) Happily they were pretty young, and still liked to party.
It wasn't a wild night. I was asleep by about 1:15 or so, but I had some odd dreams that I'm still trying to figure out.
The strangest thing about the trip was this. In Saskatchewan retailers have to hide cigarettes behind a curtain. The rationale employed here is that by hiding them, they can't be a lure for children. I think that's brilliantly stupid. Once again smokers are being treated like social pariahs. It felt like I was trying to buy porn. Soon you'll have to get them wrapped in brown paper.
Thursday, May 05, 2005
05/05/05
So far, I’m having a pretty good week. My friend Daryl managed a safe return from Oz. He’s a busy guy these days, in for two days and then off to Toronto. I’m glad he’s doing well. He seems to be in a much better way than the last time I saw him. The Melbourne festival seems to have done him some good.
This weekend I’m off to Saskatoon and then Regina. I’m looking forward to it. The last few shows I’ve had have been a little shaky, (this is a bit of an understatement…) and this run should be good to help scrape off some of the taint of Interior BC that always seems to stick to me.
The last time I went out there was over a year ago, and I have to say if this time is even half as much fun, it will rock.
Week 5 of the diet is going well. I’m getting a little sick of soup and crave for things that I know are beyond bad for me. Just about every time I pass by KFC my brain starts to churn out sick, twisted little fantasies about fried chicken. So far I have resisted. But I fear its only a matter of time before the jig is up.
This weekend I’m off to Saskatoon and then Regina. I’m looking forward to it. The last few shows I’ve had have been a little shaky, (this is a bit of an understatement…) and this run should be good to help scrape off some of the taint of Interior BC that always seems to stick to me.
The last time I went out there was over a year ago, and I have to say if this time is even half as much fun, it will rock.
Week 5 of the diet is going well. I’m getting a little sick of soup and crave for things that I know are beyond bad for me. Just about every time I pass by KFC my brain starts to churn out sick, twisted little fantasies about fried chicken. So far I have resisted. But I fear its only a matter of time before the jig is up.
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Acme Brand Batman costume...
batmanNot
Originally uploaded by whiskeydrenched.
Now I'll finally catch that Road Runner... BEEP BEEP!!!
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